Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Tags
  • Popular
  • World
  • Users
  • Groups
Skins
  • Light
  • Cerulean
  • Cosmo
  • Flatly
  • Journal
  • Litera
  • Lumen
  • Lux
  • Materia
  • Minty
  • Morph
  • Pulse
  • Sandstone
  • Simplex
  • Sketchy
  • Spacelab
  • United
  • Yeti
  • Zephyr
  • Dark
  • Cyborg
  • Darkly
  • Quartz
  • Slate
  • Solar
  • Superhero
  • Vapor

  • Default (No Skin)
  • No Skin
Collapse
Code Project
  1. Home
  2. The Lounge
  3. Question Time

Question Time

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
question
18 Posts 12 Posters 0 Views 1 Watching
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • Z Zyxil

    How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? i'll post the answer in about a half hour. -John

    D Offline
    D Offline
    David Wulff
    wrote on last edited by
    #2

    I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


    David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

    I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

    Z R M B R 5 Replies Last reply
    0
    • D David Wulff

      I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


      David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

      I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

      Z Offline
      Z Offline
      Zyxil
      wrote on last edited by
      #3

      another of my favorites is: how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? two, but they have problems getting inside -John

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • D David Wulff

        I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


        David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

        I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

        R Offline
        R Offline
        Roger Wright
        wrote on last edited by
        #4

        How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Californians screw in hot tubs, not light bulbs. This Signature is Temporarily Out of Order

        S 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • Z Zyxil

          How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? i'll post the answer in about a half hour. -John

          Z Offline
          Z Offline
          Zyxil
          wrote on last edited by
          #5

          i gotta run, it being quitting time here on the east coast of the US... that and i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, so, without further ado,,, How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? the fish! big thanks go to david, who is the only one who even responded,, good night, i'll be here all week ;P -John

          S D O 3 Replies Last reply
          0
          • R Roger Wright

            How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Californians screw in hot tubs, not light bulbs. This Signature is Temporarily Out of Order

            S Offline
            S Offline
            Shog9 0
            wrote on last edited by
            #6

            LOL! :-D

            Shog9

            Let me hear you / Make decisions / Without your television

            Join Team CodeProject

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • D David Wulff

              I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


              David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

              I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

              M Offline
              M Offline
              Michael Dunn
              wrote on last edited by
              #7

              How many women does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just sit there in the dark and bitch. :cool: --Mike-- Just released - RightClick-Encrypt v1.4 - Adds fast & easy file encryption to Explorer My really out-of-date homepage Sonork-100.19012 Acid_Helm

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • Z Zyxil

                i gotta run, it being quitting time here on the east coast of the US... that and i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, so, without further ado,,, How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? the fish! big thanks go to david, who is the only one who even responded,, good night, i'll be here all week ;P -John

                S Offline
                S Offline
                Shog9 0
                wrote on last edited by
                #8

                The Fiiish? Where is that Fish? ;P

                Shog9

                Let me hear you / Make decisions / Without your television

                Join Team CodeProject

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • Z Zyxil

                  i gotta run, it being quitting time here on the east coast of the US... that and i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, so, without further ado,,, How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? the fish! big thanks go to david, who is the only one who even responded,, good night, i'll be here all week ;P -John

                  D Offline
                  D Offline
                  David Wulff
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #9

                  John Morales wrote: the fish! That and just about everything else. My personal favourite is: "Two. One to pickle the giraffe and the other to eat the sink." There are endless possiblities. :-D


                  David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

                  I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

                  B 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • S Simon Walton

                    How many homophobics does it take to change a lightbulb? None - they're all too busy making up gay jokes. Ok, so I forget the punchline, but you have to commend me for trying.

                    8

                    SIMON WALTON
                    SONORK ID 100.10024

                    L Offline
                    L Offline
                    Lost User
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #10

                    Simon Walton wrote: but you have to commend me for trying. :commend: Consider yourself commended.

                    Mike Mullikin :beer: You can't really dust for vomit. Nigel Tufnel - Spinal Tap

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • Z Zyxil

                      How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? i'll post the answer in about a half hour. -John

                      S Offline
                      S Offline
                      Simon Walton
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #11

                      How many homophobics does it take to change a lightbulb? None - they're all too busy making up gay jokes. Ok, so I forget the punchline, but you have to commend me for trying.

                      8

                      SIMON WALTON
                      SONORK ID 100.10024

                      L 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • D David Wulff

                        I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


                        David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

                        I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

                        R Offline
                        R Offline
                        Richard Stringer
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #12

                        How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? Can't be done. Its a hardware problem. Richard When we mean to build, We first survey the plot, then draw the model; And when we see the figure of the house, Then must we rate the cost of the execution. William Shakespeare (King Henry IV)

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • D David Wulff

                          I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


                          David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

                          I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

                          B Offline
                          B Offline
                          Barry Lapthorn
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #13

                          How many Oxbridge/Ivy League* graduates does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, and then they wait for the world to revolve around them...... * delete as applicable.... B.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • Z Zyxil

                            i gotta run, it being quitting time here on the east coast of the US... that and i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, so, without further ado,,, How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? the fish! big thanks go to david, who is the only one who even responded,, good night, i'll be here all week ;P -John

                            O Offline
                            O Offline
                            Olli
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #14

                            John Morales wrote: i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, LOL ! exactly what happened...... ;)

                            Olli I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.....
                            :suss: :rolleyes: :suss:

                            C 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • Z Zyxil

                              How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? i'll post the answer in about a half hour. -John

                              L Offline
                              L Offline
                              Lost User
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #15

                              How many M$ employess does it take to change a light bulb ? None, they define darkness as the new light. Would you like to meet my teddy bear ?

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • D David Wulff

                                John Morales wrote: the fish! That and just about everything else. My personal favourite is: "Two. One to pickle the giraffe and the other to eat the sink." There are endless possiblities. :-D


                                David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

                                I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

                                B Offline
                                B Offline
                                benjymous
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #16

                                "Two - One to hold the step ladder, and the other to fill the bath with brightly coloured machine tools" is my favourite -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • O Olli

                                  John Morales wrote: i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, LOL ! exactly what happened...... ;)

                                  Olli I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.....
                                  :suss: :rolleyes: :suss:

                                  C Offline
                                  C Offline
                                  Chris Maunder
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #17

                                  It wasn't me! It wasn't me! :D cheers, Chris Maunder

                                  O 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • C Chris Maunder

                                    It wasn't me! It wasn't me! :D cheers, Chris Maunder

                                    O Offline
                                    O Offline
                                    Olli
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #18

                                    Chris Maunder wrote: It wasn't me! It wasn't me! This is what I have said too......;);P

                                    Olli I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.....
                                    :suss: :rolleyes: :suss:

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    Reply
                                    • Reply as topic
                                    Log in to reply
                                    • Oldest to Newest
                                    • Newest to Oldest
                                    • Most Votes


                                    • Login

                                    • Don't have an account? Register

                                    • Login or register to search.
                                    • First post
                                      Last post
                                    0
                                    • Categories
                                    • Recent
                                    • Tags
                                    • Popular
                                    • World
                                    • Users
                                    • Groups