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Question Time

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • D David Wulff

    I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


    David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

    I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

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    Michael Dunn
    wrote on last edited by
    #7

    How many women does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just sit there in the dark and bitch. :cool: --Mike-- Just released - RightClick-Encrypt v1.4 - Adds fast & easy file encryption to Explorer My really out-of-date homepage Sonork-100.19012 Acid_Helm

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    • Z Zyxil

      i gotta run, it being quitting time here on the east coast of the US... that and i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, so, without further ado,,, How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? the fish! big thanks go to david, who is the only one who even responded,, good night, i'll be here all week ;P -John

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      Shog9 0
      wrote on last edited by
      #8

      The Fiiish? Where is that Fish? ;P

      Shog9

      Let me hear you / Make decisions / Without your television

      Join Team CodeProject

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      • Z Zyxil

        i gotta run, it being quitting time here on the east coast of the US... that and i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, so, without further ado,,, How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? the fish! big thanks go to david, who is the only one who even responded,, good night, i'll be here all week ;P -John

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        David Wulff
        wrote on last edited by
        #9

        John Morales wrote: the fish! That and just about everything else. My personal favourite is: "Two. One to pickle the giraffe and the other to eat the sink." There are endless possiblities. :-D


        David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

        I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

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        • S Simon Walton

          How many homophobics does it take to change a lightbulb? None - they're all too busy making up gay jokes. Ok, so I forget the punchline, but you have to commend me for trying.

          8

          SIMON WALTON
          SONORK ID 100.10024

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          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #10

          Simon Walton wrote: but you have to commend me for trying. :commend: Consider yourself commended.

          Mike Mullikin :beer: You can't really dust for vomit. Nigel Tufnel - Spinal Tap

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          • Z Zyxil

            How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? i'll post the answer in about a half hour. -John

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            S Offline
            Simon Walton
            wrote on last edited by
            #11

            How many homophobics does it take to change a lightbulb? None - they're all too busy making up gay jokes. Ok, so I forget the punchline, but you have to commend me for trying.

            8

            SIMON WALTON
            SONORK ID 100.10024

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            • D David Wulff

              I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


              David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

              I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

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              R Offline
              Richard Stringer
              wrote on last edited by
              #12

              How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? Can't be done. Its a hardware problem. Richard When we mean to build, We first survey the plot, then draw the model; And when we see the figure of the house, Then must we rate the cost of the execution. William Shakespeare (King Henry IV)

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              • D David Wulff

                I already know this one (or I should say "answers" :p) so I will not give it away yet, but to add to your list... How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to screw in the new bulb and four to talk about how much they'll miss the old one. How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and one not to change it. How many telemarketers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you are eating dinner. How many reference librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. How many bluegrass musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to change it and three to complain that it's electric. How many chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb? One... but it takes him three visits. How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. How many men does it take to change a toilet-paper roll? Who knows; it's never happened.


                David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

                I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

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                B Offline
                Barry Lapthorn
                wrote on last edited by
                #13

                How many Oxbridge/Ivy League* graduates does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, and then they wait for the world to revolve around them...... * delete as applicable.... B.

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                • Z Zyxil

                  i gotta run, it being quitting time here on the east coast of the US... that and i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, so, without further ado,,, How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? the fish! big thanks go to david, who is the only one who even responded,, good night, i'll be here all week ;P -John

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                  Olli
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #14

                  John Morales wrote: i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, LOL ! exactly what happened...... ;)

                  Olli I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.....
                  :suss: :rolleyes: :suss:

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                  • Z Zyxil

                    How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? i'll post the answer in about a half hour. -John

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                    Lost User
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #15

                    How many M$ employess does it take to change a light bulb ? None, they define darkness as the new light. Would you like to meet my teddy bear ?

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                    • D David Wulff

                      John Morales wrote: the fish! That and just about everything else. My personal favourite is: "Two. One to pickle the giraffe and the other to eat the sink." There are endless possiblities. :-D


                      David Wulff http://www.davidwulff.co.uk

                      I'm not schizophrenic, are we.

                      B Offline
                      B Offline
                      benjymous
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #16

                      "Two - One to hold the step ladder, and the other to fill the bath with brightly coloured machine tools" is my favourite -- Help me! I'm turning into a grapefruit!

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                      • O Olli

                        John Morales wrote: i wanted to get the answer in before chris crashes the server, like he is warning will happen,,, LOL ! exactly what happened...... ;)

                        Olli I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.....
                        :suss: :rolleyes: :suss:

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                        C Offline
                        Chris Maunder
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #17

                        It wasn't me! It wasn't me! :D cheers, Chris Maunder

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                        • C Chris Maunder

                          It wasn't me! It wasn't me! :D cheers, Chris Maunder

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                          Olli
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #18

                          Chris Maunder wrote: It wasn't me! It wasn't me! This is what I have said too......;);P

                          Olli I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.....
                          :suss: :rolleyes: :suss:

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