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My Wife is Funny

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  • realJSOPR realJSOP

    We live in Texas. In the United States. One of the few countries that is not brave enough to specify a "national language". This weekend, we were in a furniture store being helped by a Hispanic guy. In the middle of our visit, one of the warehouse monkies came up to him and started a conversation about some furniture that we were inquiring about. The conversation was entirely in Spanish. This really irritated my wife, so she interrupted them. "My husband and I speak English and .45ACP. How would you like to proceed?" Looks like I'll be getting a new t-shirt soon. :)

    ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
    -----
    You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
    -----
    "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

    A Offline
    A Offline
    Andrew Rissing
    wrote on last edited by
    #29

    Funny quote. :-D But out of curiosity...While you live a few hours closer to the border than I, why would it really matter if they spoke to each other in Spanish? The gentleman (or hombre if you prefer) who came out of the warehouse may not have spoken English very well. It is likely not his preferred or first language. Personally, I wouldn't have cared one bit, as long as they didn't start asking me questions in Spanish expecting an answer.

    realJSOPR A 2 Replies Last reply
    0
    • Q QuiJohn

      So would specifying a national language make it illegal for two people to speak a different language in front of someone who doesn't speak that language? I thought you Texans claimed to be all about freedom.

      realJSOPR Offline
      realJSOPR Offline
      realJSOP
      wrote on last edited by
      #30

      You're free to speak English.

      ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
      -----
      You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
      -----
      "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • Q QuiJohn

        So would specifying a national language make it illegal for two people to speak a different language in front of someone who doesn't speak that language? I thought you Texans claimed to be all about freedom.

        T Offline
        T Offline
        TheGreatAndPowerfulOz
        wrote on last edited by
        #31

        It wouldn't be illegal, but it would be rude. Especially when you were interrupted by someone else that carried-on a conversation in another language. Get a clue.

        If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
        You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • G GuyThiebaut

          As long as you exclude the UK from your definition of Europe. Most British people just speak English and Foreign - Foreign being shouting and speaking more slowly :laugh:

          Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential.(Winston Churchill)
          A Offline
          A Offline
          Albert Holguin
          wrote on last edited by
          #32

          :laugh: I can't complain about the Brits... I've been lost in Italy and had a group of them help me out... :thumbsup:

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • A Andrew Rissing

            Funny quote. :-D But out of curiosity...While you live a few hours closer to the border than I, why would it really matter if they spoke to each other in Spanish? The gentleman (or hombre if you prefer) who came out of the warehouse may not have spoken English very well. It is likely not his preferred or first language. Personally, I wouldn't have cared one bit, as long as they didn't start asking me questions in Spanish expecting an answer.

            realJSOPR Offline
            realJSOPR Offline
            realJSOP
            wrote on last edited by
            #33

            In a customer service situation, it's RUDE to speak a language other than the language used by the customer to initiate the conversation. Personally, I freakin' hate it.

            ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
            -----
            You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
            -----
            "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

            A 1 Reply Last reply
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            • N Nish Nishant

              Albert Holguin wrote:

              everyone else speaks multiple languages...

              This is true for India. Nearly everyone speaks their local language (tamil, malayalam, hindi, telugu, punjabi...) and English. Sometimes people speak more than one Indian language.

              Regards, Nish


              My technology blog: voidnish.wordpress.com

              T Offline
              T Offline
              TheGreatAndPowerfulOz
              wrote on last edited by
              #34

              Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

              English

              In India, isn't English spelled Inglish?

              If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
              You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun

              N 1 Reply Last reply
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              • T Tom Deketelaere

                Albert Holguin wrote:

                you know, most people in Europe speak 3-4 languages

                Hmmm not really. The french refuse to speak anything but French. The Germans might also speak English but not much. The Spaniards might also speak English. There really is only one country where we learn 3-4 languages and that's only half the country then. (Belgium, you know the one without a government ;P ) For the record I speak: Dutch, English, French and German.

                L Offline
                L Offline
                Lost User
                wrote on last edited by
                #35

                Tom Deketelaere wrote:

                The french refuse to speak anything but French.

                They might refuse to speak it. Doesn't mean they can't.

                Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                T 1 Reply Last reply
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                • realJSOPR realJSOP

                  We live in Texas. In the United States. One of the few countries that is not brave enough to specify a "national language". This weekend, we were in a furniture store being helped by a Hispanic guy. In the middle of our visit, one of the warehouse monkies came up to him and started a conversation about some furniture that we were inquiring about. The conversation was entirely in Spanish. This really irritated my wife, so she interrupted them. "My husband and I speak English and .45ACP. How would you like to proceed?" Looks like I'll be getting a new t-shirt soon. :)

                  ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
                  -----
                  You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
                  -----
                  "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

                  T Offline
                  T Offline
                  Tim Carmichael
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #36

                  Since .45ACP seems to be the dominant theme, have you approached Congress about having an official language? If not, then why not?

                  realJSOPR 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • A Albert Holguin

                    I've done my fair share of traveling over there... point is... everyone else speaks multiple languages...

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    Slacker007
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #37

                    Albert Holguin wrote:

                    everyone else speaks multiple languages...

                    no they don't. Most people who speak other languages, "know" these other languages out of necessity instead of desire. America's mother tongue is bastardized English. This is my mother language. I shouldn't have to learn someone else's language in my own F'n country.

                    Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
                    "No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)

                    N M R M 4 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • realJSOPR realJSOP

                      We live in Texas. In the United States. One of the few countries that is not brave enough to specify a "national language". This weekend, we were in a furniture store being helped by a Hispanic guy. In the middle of our visit, one of the warehouse monkies came up to him and started a conversation about some furniture that we were inquiring about. The conversation was entirely in Spanish. This really irritated my wife, so she interrupted them. "My husband and I speak English and .45ACP. How would you like to proceed?" Looks like I'll be getting a new t-shirt soon. :)

                      ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
                      -----
                      You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
                      -----
                      "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

                      H Offline
                      H Offline
                      hayrob
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #38

                      Brings out gun, shoots her and says is that funny?

                      N 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • D Dalek Dave

                        English, German, French and Spanish (French and Spanish are at a tourist level, German I am quite fluent having lived there).

                        ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] Trolls[^]

                        L Offline
                        L Offline
                        Lost User
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #39

                        I speak English, and due to familial ties I can understand people in Derbyshire.

                        Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                        1 Reply Last reply
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                        • T TheGreatAndPowerfulOz

                          Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

                          English

                          In India, isn't English spelled Inglish?

                          If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
                          You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun

                          N Offline
                          N Offline
                          Nish Nishant
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #40

                          ahmed zahmed wrote:

                          In India, isn't English spelled Inglish?

                          You are thinking of Canadians.

                          Regards, Nish


                          My technology blog: voidnish.wordpress.com

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • D Dalek Dave

                            No, people in Europe mainly speak two languages, Their mother tongue and English. Except the English who speak every language in the world. They do this by speaking English VERY LOULDLY! and v e r y _ s l o w l y

                            ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave CCC Link[^] Trolls[^]

                            S Offline
                            S Offline
                            Steven J Jowett
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #41

                            I have often heard it said that "The English are lazy when I comes to learning other languages.". I would retort "The English did not conquer half the world so that we could learn other languages!". No I know that sounds imperialistic, that's because it is :-D

                            Steve Jowett ------------------------- Real Programmers don't need comments -- the code is obvious.

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • Q QuiJohn

                              Dalek Dave wrote:

                              It means that all official documentation would have to be in all official languages, road signs, warnings, anything that affects people and is issued by the state in fact.

                              I know what it means, I was wondering if John did. I just see no point.

                              realJSOPR Offline
                              realJSOPR Offline
                              realJSOP
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #42

                              If the offical language was established, the cost to government and businesses would go down because at that point, they're nly obliged to use the national language on signage, forms, products, etc. It's a win/win situation (and I get to save ammo for more important situations).

                              ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
                              -----
                              You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
                              -----
                              "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                We live in Texas. In the United States. One of the few countries that is not brave enough to specify a "national language". This weekend, we were in a furniture store being helped by a Hispanic guy. In the middle of our visit, one of the warehouse monkies came up to him and started a conversation about some furniture that we were inquiring about. The conversation was entirely in Spanish. This really irritated my wife, so she interrupted them. "My husband and I speak English and .45ACP. How would you like to proceed?" Looks like I'll be getting a new t-shirt soon. :)

                                ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
                                -----
                                You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
                                -----
                                "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

                                H Offline
                                H Offline
                                hairy_hats
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #43

                                I fail to see the humour in threatening someone with a weapon just for speaking another language.

                                T M N 3 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • S Slacker007

                                  Albert Holguin wrote:

                                  everyone else speaks multiple languages...

                                  no they don't. Most people who speak other languages, "know" these other languages out of necessity instead of desire. America's mother tongue is bastardized English. This is my mother language. I shouldn't have to learn someone else's language in my own F'n country.

                                  Just along for the ride. "the meat from that butcher is just the dogs danglies, absolutely amazing cuts of beef." - DaveAuld (2011)
                                  "No, that is just the earthly manifestation of the Great God Retardon." - Nagy Vilmos (2011)

                                  N Offline
                                  N Offline
                                  Nish Nishant
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #44

                                  Slacker007 wrote:

                                  I shouldn't have to learn someone else's language in my own F'n country.

                                  Yeah but would you be bothered if two people spoke a foreign language in your presence? When my wife and I are in public, we normally try and use English, but sometimes when we make a comment to each other we use Malayalam. Of course we never do this if we are in a discussion that includes non-Malayalam speakers.

                                  Regards, Nish


                                  My technology blog: voidnish.wordpress.com

                                  S 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • T Tim Carmichael

                                    Since .45ACP seems to be the dominant theme, have you approached Congress about having an official language? If not, then why not?

                                    realJSOPR Offline
                                    realJSOPR Offline
                                    realJSOP
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #45

                                    Because they're afraid it'll cause a ruckus with the 9mm folks, and we won't even begin to discuss the .38 Special guys who, by their very nature, think they're "Special".

                                    ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
                                    -----
                                    You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
                                    -----
                                    "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • A Andrew Rissing

                                      Funny quote. :-D But out of curiosity...While you live a few hours closer to the border than I, why would it really matter if they spoke to each other in Spanish? The gentleman (or hombre if you prefer) who came out of the warehouse may not have spoken English very well. It is likely not his preferred or first language. Personally, I wouldn't have cared one bit, as long as they didn't start asking me questions in Spanish expecting an answer.

                                      A Offline
                                      A Offline
                                      Albert Holguin
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #46

                                      Andrew Rissing wrote:

                                      The gentleman (or hombre if you prefer) who came out of the warehouse may not have spoken English very well.

                                      Good point...

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                        We live in Texas. In the United States. One of the few countries that is not brave enough to specify a "national language". This weekend, we were in a furniture store being helped by a Hispanic guy. In the middle of our visit, one of the warehouse monkies came up to him and started a conversation about some furniture that we were inquiring about. The conversation was entirely in Spanish. This really irritated my wife, so she interrupted them. "My husband and I speak English and .45ACP. How would you like to proceed?" Looks like I'll be getting a new t-shirt soon. :)

                                        ".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
                                        -----
                                        You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
                                        -----
                                        "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997

                                        F Offline
                                        F Offline
                                        Fla_Golfr
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #47

                                        I had a college proffessor that could communicate in 7 different languages, from scandanavian, to Indian, to french, to vietnamese, etc. I was very envious cause I thought I could only communicate in one language, i.e., american english. Then my wife reminded me that I can communicate in two languages. UH? American English and Southern Redneck! ju-eat-yet? no-ju?

                                        S 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • H hairy_hats

                                          I fail to see the humour in threatening someone with a weapon just for speaking another language.

                                          T Offline
                                          T Offline
                                          TheGreatAndPowerfulOz
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #48

                                          There was no threat. She wasn't carrying and don't try to tell me that quoting a bullet size to someone who's probably ignorant of its meaning is a threat. Especially when it's out-of-context and you're not carrying.

                                          If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
                                          You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun

                                          H W A P 4 Replies Last reply
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