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Software company internal low

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  • D devvvy

    Internal Law - wtf? your majesty royal arseness you would like your *underling* to serve you like a King don't you. I treat even my domestic helper with respect and I don't write little red book what's permitted and what's not. where the hell do you come from man?

    dev

    S Offline
    S Offline
    SockPuppeteer
    wrote on last edited by
    #16

    Wow! who got up your chuff this morning!

    .\\axxx

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    • M Mycroft Holmes

      As we don't host anything on youtube our net nazi feels justified in banning the site, along with any other social media and all blogs, we had to fight the blog lock.

      Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

      A Offline
      A Offline
      AspDotNetDev
      wrote on last edited by
      #17

      Surely that entitles you to a company-paid subscription to Lynda.com and various other video learning resources, since you can't access the free resource that is YouTube, correct? :-D

      Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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      • A AspDotNetDev

        Surely that entitles you to a company-paid subscription to Lynda.com and various other video learning resources, since you can't access the free resource that is YouTube, correct? :-D

        Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

        M Offline
        M Offline
        Mycroft Holmes
        wrote on last edited by
        #18

        I'm chicken I'll wait till I get home to find out what Lynda.com is :-D !

        Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

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        • M Mycroft Holmes

          I'm chicken I'll wait till I get home to find out what Lynda.com is :-D !

          Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

          A Offline
          A Offline
          AspDotNetDev
          wrote on last edited by
          #19

          :laugh: It's nothing you would have worked on in the past (assuming I'm remembering your "interesting" past correctly). It's a professional learning site. Their main thing is high quality videos that teach you various software products (e.g., all the Adobe stuff, such as Photoshop). They also have files to download (like Code Project) and transcripts (in case you want to search for text that was spoken in the video). If I had more time, I'd be on there constantly.

          Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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          • D devvvy

            Internal Law - wtf? your majesty royal arseness you would like your *underling* to serve you like a King don't you. I treat even my domestic helper with respect and I don't write little red book what's permitted and what's not. where the hell do you come from man?

            dev

            P Offline
            P Offline
            PaulowniaK
            wrote on last edited by
            #20

            Getting up on the wrong side of the bed? You need to chill, man! ;P Either that or you have a very high spec for your sense of humour that it all flew over our heads... Anyway, what the OP means by "law", I think, are company rules. I don't think he wants to play being a tyrant but wants to make it clear what time his employees should turn up for work and how they get paid etc.

            Almost, but not quite, entirely unlike... me...

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            • P PaulowniaK

              Getting up on the wrong side of the bed? You need to chill, man! ;P Either that or you have a very high spec for your sense of humour that it all flew over our heads... Anyway, what the OP means by "law", I think, are company rules. I don't think he wants to play being a tyrant but wants to make it clear what time his employees should turn up for work and how they get paid etc.

              Almost, but not quite, entirely unlike... me...

              D Offline
              D Offline
              devvvy
              wrote on last edited by
              #21

              PaulowniaK wrote:

              Anyway, what the OP means by "law", I think, are company rules.
              I don't think he wants to play being a tyrant but wants to make it clear what time his employees should turn up for work and how they get paid etc.

              it'd be fair to layout generally accepted demands such as work days vs paid leaves or normal working hours (which is not observed anyway) but "Internal Laws" does sounds "House Rules" along the lines "One shall not leave office sooner than your commanding officer."

              dev

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              • D devvvy

                PaulowniaK wrote:

                Anyway, what the OP means by "law", I think, are company rules.
                I don't think he wants to play being a tyrant but wants to make it clear what time his employees should turn up for work and how they get paid etc.

                it'd be fair to layout generally accepted demands such as work days vs paid leaves or normal working hours (which is not observed anyway) but "Internal Laws" does sounds "House Rules" along the lines "One shall not leave office sooner than your commanding officer."

                dev

                P Offline
                P Offline
                PaulowniaK
                wrote on last edited by
                #22

                While I do get where you're coming from, I'll put this down, just in case...

                Chris wrote:

                7. Not everyone's first language is English. Be understanding.

                Almost, but not quite, entirely unlike... me...

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                • P PaulowniaK

                  While I do get where you're coming from, I'll put this down, just in case...

                  Chris wrote:

                  7. Not everyone's first language is English. Be understanding.

                  Almost, but not quite, entirely unlike... me...

                  D Offline
                  D Offline
                  devvvy
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #23

                  PaulowniaK wrote:

                  7. Not everyone's first language is English. Be understanding.

                  fair enuf cheers

                  dev

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                  • H Huzifa Terkawi

                    if you are about to start a new software company , what would your company internal law look like ? any hint will highly appreciated :) thanks

                    huzifa

                    B Offline
                    B Offline
                    BobJanova
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #24

                    You want to be as flexible as you can – the best developers are creative people and will be stifled by aggressive monitoring or timekeeping rules. At my company we have a guideline number of hours we should do each day, and moderately flexible times (as long as you are around 10-4, you can extend your day at either end); we don't have strict Internet usage rules and although we currently have a rule against listening to music, it's not enforced as long as you have headphones on.

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                    • M Mycroft Holmes

                      PraneethNSubasekara wrote:

                      Dont restrict listening to music while working

                      Wow I never considered a company would want to do that! I imagine the same attitude would supply nice open plan benches to work on. There door, the door, wheres the door, I'm outta here!

                      Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

                      K Offline
                      K Offline
                      Keith Barrow
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #25

                      Mine is. To complete the double-whammy they are also want to pipe Radio n int the office, where n < 3. The worst outcome would be Radio 1 being piped, and frankly don't Radio 2 either, not if I'm forced to sit and listen to it for 8 hours a day.

                      Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
                      -Or-
                      A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

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                      • S SockPuppeteer

                        Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's ASPx

                        .\\axxx

                        M Offline
                        M Offline
                        Maximilien
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #26

                        SockPuppeteer wrote:

                        Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's Wifi

                        Nihil obstat

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                        • M Mycroft Holmes

                          PraneethNSubasekara wrote:

                          HR managers

                          Okay that explains it, HR are a bunch of anally retentive, brain dead, vacuous idiots who are a complete PITA, and no I'm not prejudiced, that is fair and balanced assessment of HR, and their managers are the worst of the lot!

                          Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

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                          C Offline
                          Colin Mullikin
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #27

                          Mycroft Holmes wrote:

                          a bunch of anally retentive, brain dead, vacuous idiots who are a complete PITA

                          Tell us how you really feel... :laugh:

                          The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

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                          • C Colin Mullikin

                            Mycroft Holmes wrote:

                            a bunch of anally retentive, brain dead, vacuous idiots who are a complete PITA

                            Tell us how you really feel... :laugh:

                            The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

                            C Offline
                            C Offline
                            charlieg
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #28

                            He didn't. He just kept it kid safe. However, to be fair, I have once been a manager, and HR people can come in handy from time to time.

                            Charlie Gilley You're going to tell me what I want to know, or I'm going to beat you to death in your own house. "Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783 “They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759

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                            • M Mycroft Holmes

                              I'm chicken I'll wait till I get home to find out what Lynda.com is :-D !

                              Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

                              A Offline
                              A Offline
                              AspDotNetDev
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #29

                              Now that I think about it, I think I was thinking about Marc Clifton in my previous message. Or maybe not. I don't know. :doh:

                              Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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                              • A AspDotNetDev

                                Now that I think about it, I think I was thinking about Marc Clifton in my previous message. Or maybe not. I don't know. :doh:

                                Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

                                M Offline
                                M Offline
                                Mycroft Holmes
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #30

                                I imagine Marc knows all about that site!

                                Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

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                                • M Mycroft Holmes

                                  PraneethNSubasekara wrote:

                                  HR managers

                                  Okay that explains it, HR are a bunch of anally retentive, brain dead, vacuous idiots who are a complete PITA, and no I'm not prejudiced, that is fair and balanced assessment of HR, and their managers are the worst of the lot!

                                  Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

                                  C Offline
                                  C Offline
                                  CHill60
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #31

                                  Oh NOW I wish voting was on ... 5, 5, 5 :)

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • B BobJanova

                                    You want to be as flexible as you can – the best developers are creative people and will be stifled by aggressive monitoring or timekeeping rules. At my company we have a guideline number of hours we should do each day, and moderately flexible times (as long as you are around 10-4, you can extend your day at either end); we don't have strict Internet usage rules and although we currently have a rule against listening to music, it's not enforced as long as you have headphones on.

                                    R Offline
                                    R Offline
                                    Rosenne
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #32

                                    We have similar rules, plus: no overtime (on a weekly basis) except in special cases.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • H Huzifa Terkawi

                                      if you are about to start a new software company , what would your company internal law look like ? any hint will highly appreciated :) thanks

                                      huzifa

                                      R Offline
                                      R Offline
                                      Roger165
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #33

                                      1. Freedom 2. Fast computers with many monitors 3. White Boards - Wireless 4. Coffee, water, etc. 5. Nice bathrooms 6. Nerf toys Optional A. Fridge dedicated to Beer

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                                      • M Mycroft Holmes

                                        PraneethNSubasekara wrote:

                                        Dont restrict listening to music while working

                                        Wow I never considered a company would want to do that! I imagine the same attitude would supply nice open plan benches to work on. There door, the door, wheres the door, I'm outta here!

                                        Never underestimate the power of human stupidity RAH

                                        D Offline
                                        D Offline
                                        Dan Neely
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #34

                                        The manufacturing job I worked at between when I graduated and got a programming job banned music about a week and a half before I left because production rates had dropped (the fact that they'd just sacked about 70-80% of the midnight shift and replaced them with newbies obviously wasn't a factor :rolleyes: ) and told us we'd be allowed to have our CD players back when the numbers improved. My comment (to coworkers, not the pointy hairs) was the standard 'the beatings will continue until morale improves'. I'm not sure what eventually happened since we were even farther from the (virtually impossible to meet) nominal quotas my last full week there. :doh:

                                        Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason? Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful? --Zachris Topelius Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies. -- Sarah Hoyt

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                                        • M Maximilien

                                          SockPuppeteer wrote:

                                          Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's Wifi

                                          Nihil obstat

                                          L Offline
                                          L Offline
                                          Lost User
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #35

                                          “Thou shall not make database calls in vain, for the database server will not hold him guiltless who makes calls to it in vain.

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