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town home property encroachment

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  • F Forogar

    Just tell him that if it accidentally catches fire because it is encroaching on your smoke pit, you won't be held responsible. Also it may be blocking your Archery Range, but not to worry I am sure the arrows will pass harmlessly between anyone bouncing on the trampoline if you get the timing just right. If he can use all the area for a pastime then so can everyone else. BTW: I never yell when I am angry at someone. In fact I do my best to not show my anger at all, I just make my point(s) in a quiet, calm manner. Some people have told me I am scary when I do this - maybe because I am British and all Americans think we are all secretly evil masterminds per Hollywood stereotypes! Obviously, if you are an American this wouldn't work for you so the yelling (not in front of spouse and offspring) is probably the acceptable norm. PS. Casually carrying a gardening implement, such as a hoe, machete or axe can also help make sure they pay attention. Wear gardening gloves to enhance the impression that you were just recently working in the garden and not actually being threatening.

    - I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

    C Offline
    C Offline
    Colin Mullikin
    wrote on last edited by
    #32

    Forogar wrote:

    maybe because I am British and all Americans think we are all secretly evil masterminds per Hollywood stereotypes!

    I don't think it's really a secret... :laugh:

    The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

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    • F Forogar

      Just tell him that if it accidentally catches fire because it is encroaching on your smoke pit, you won't be held responsible. Also it may be blocking your Archery Range, but not to worry I am sure the arrows will pass harmlessly between anyone bouncing on the trampoline if you get the timing just right. If he can use all the area for a pastime then so can everyone else. BTW: I never yell when I am angry at someone. In fact I do my best to not show my anger at all, I just make my point(s) in a quiet, calm manner. Some people have told me I am scary when I do this - maybe because I am British and all Americans think we are all secretly evil masterminds per Hollywood stereotypes! Obviously, if you are an American this wouldn't work for you so the yelling (not in front of spouse and offspring) is probably the acceptable norm. PS. Casually carrying a gardening implement, such as a hoe, machete or axe can also help make sure they pay attention. Wear gardening gloves to enhance the impression that you were just recently working in the garden and not actually being threatening.

      - I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

      J Offline
      J Offline
      Jeremy Falcon
      wrote on last edited by
      #33

      Forogar wrote:

      BTW: I never yell when I am angry at someone. In fact I do my best to not show my anger at all, I just make my point(s) in a quiet, calm manner. Some people have told me I am scary when I do this - maybe because I am British and all Americans think we are all secretly evil masterminds per Hollywood stereotypes! Obviously, if you are an American this wouldn't work for you so the yelling (not in front of spouse and offspring) is probably the acceptable norm.

      :laugh:

      Jeremy Falcon

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      • Sander RosselS Sander Rossel

        Well, I don't know your neighbor and I don't know how often you go into your garden, but personally I'd "knocked" on his door and said something like "That's a nice looking trampoline you've got there... Takes up a little space..." See how he responds, perhaps at this point he already starts apologizing and asking if it's alright or else he'd take it away. If he doesn't perhaps continue like "You know, it wouldn't hurt asking your neighbors if they'd mind such a large trampoline in their garden..." He probably knows he's wrong, you know he's wrong, your other neighbors know he's wrong. Nothing can really justify taking up all of your shared garden space. But now you've gone and made an ass of yourself, shouting and cursing at him. And now you're both wrong :)

        Visit my blog at Sander's bits - Writing the code you need. Or read my articles at my CodeProject profile.

        Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability. — Edsger W. Dijkstra

        Regards, Sander

        J Offline
        J Offline
        Jeremy Falcon
        wrote on last edited by
        #34

        Sander Rossel wrote:

        But now you've gone and made an ass of yourself, shouting and cursing at him. And now you're both wrong

        I know you're right man. I can't go back in time, but I'm gonna try to handle it the right way now at least.

        Jeremy Falcon

        Sander RosselS 1 Reply Last reply
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        • J Jorgen Andersson

          The problem with that approach is that if it had a chance of working, the neighbour wouldn't have put up the trampoline without asking in the first hand. :sigh:

          Wrong is evil and must be defeated. - Jeff Ello

          J Offline
          J Offline
          Jeremy Falcon
          wrote on last edited by
          #35

          Half the reason I got upset is because he wasn't friendly about it at all, and it doesn't take much to get me going it seems. :(

          Jeremy Falcon

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          • J JimmyRopes

            Too late to undo the shouting and cursing, but as long as you weren't threatening he doesn't have anything he can come after you with. Let's face it you are not going to be invited to his trampoline party or get a christmas card. Doesn't sound like someone who you would probably like to socialize with so there is no loss there. The HOA route is the only way to go. They will probably come over to take a look and tell him to remove it because there has been a complaint.

            Once you lose your pride the rest is easy. In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha

            J Offline
            J Offline
            Jeremy Falcon
            wrote on last edited by
            #36

            JimmyRopes wrote:

            The HOA route is the only way to go. They will probably come over to take a look and tell him to remove it because there has been a complaint.

            I hope. They don't seem to be terribly efficient in getting back to me, but we shall see.

            Jeremy Falcon

            J 1 Reply Last reply
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            • J Jeremy Falcon

              Anyone that knows me, may be aware that at times, I may or may not have a not-so-rational hot temper. I'd like to think it's because I am wise and mature and all-knowing, well beyond my years. YMMV Well, yesterday I got hot tempered again with one of my neighbors, and I'd like to see the collective opinion of you guys if y'all think it was justified or not. I currently live in a town home, and my "backyard area" is shared among three units in particular. It's not a big enclosure, but you make do with what you have. Yesterday, the neighbor two units over (and sharing the backyard area) up and decided to put a huge-arse trampoline there that quite literally consumes just about all the available non-porch space in the backyard area for all three units. I wasn't a fan of these people to start with, but after seeing that (and considering this guy didn't even bother to ask the other two of us if that was ok), I pretty much lost it and banged on his door and let him have it. Granted, there's not much I can do after venting that's legal. So, now I'm calling the housing association for the town homes and so forth to get this resolved. So my question to CP is, considering the obvious disrespect for other people when taking up all their space without even asking, do y'all think I was out of line for banging on his door and letting him have it? I don't, but then again I'm not one known for keeping the peace.

              Jeremy Falcon

              C Offline
              C Offline
              clawton
              wrote on last edited by
              #37

              Put a cover over it that doesn't touch it but is only a foot above it! It is common space, right? Then he'll know how you feel! :mad:

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              • J Jeremy Falcon

                Sander Rossel wrote:

                But now you've gone and made an ass of yourself, shouting and cursing at him. And now you're both wrong

                I know you're right man. I can't go back in time, but I'm gonna try to handle it the right way now at least.

                Jeremy Falcon

                Sander RosselS Offline
                Sander RosselS Offline
                Sander Rossel
                wrote on last edited by
                #38

                Jeremy Falcon wrote:

                I can't go back in time

                Grab a few beers, knock on your neighbors door again tell him you have some anger issues and that you're sorry and if he'd like to join you for a drink! That'll show him (no really, it's what he least expects)! After a few he might just move his trampoline too :D

                Visit my blog at Sander's bits - Writing the code you need. Or read my articles at my CodeProject profile.

                Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability. — Edsger W. Dijkstra

                Regards, Sander

                J 1 Reply Last reply
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                • Sander RosselS Sander Rossel

                  Jeremy Falcon wrote:

                  I can't go back in time

                  Grab a few beers, knock on your neighbors door again tell him you have some anger issues and that you're sorry and if he'd like to join you for a drink! That'll show him (no really, it's what he least expects)! After a few he might just move his trampoline too :D

                  Visit my blog at Sander's bits - Writing the code you need. Or read my articles at my CodeProject profile.

                  Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability. — Edsger W. Dijkstra

                  Regards, Sander

                  J Offline
                  J Offline
                  Jeremy Falcon
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #39

                  Didn't say I was a coward either. I don't intend to make friends with people like that. I just made a mistake. I don't need to be his friend.

                  Jeremy Falcon

                  Sander RosselS 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • J Jeremy Falcon

                    Didn't say I was a coward either. I don't intend to make friends with people like that. I just made a mistake. I don't need to be his friend.

                    Jeremy Falcon

                    Sander RosselS Offline
                    Sander RosselS Offline
                    Sander Rossel
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #40

                    Jeremy Falcon wrote:

                    Didn't say I was a coward either.

                    Admitting you were wrong is only for the bravest of the brave :D

                    Jeremy Falcon wrote:

                    I don't intend to make friends with people like that.

                    You don't have to. You're just going to have a friendly talk with him, and a few beers, about his trampoline. You'll catch more flies with honey than vinegar and all that.

                    Visit my blog at Sander's bits - Writing the code you need. Or read my articles at my CodeProject profile.

                    Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability. — Edsger W. Dijkstra

                    Regards, Sander

                    J 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • J Jeremy Falcon

                      Anyone that knows me, may be aware that at times, I may or may not have a not-so-rational hot temper. I'd like to think it's because I am wise and mature and all-knowing, well beyond my years. YMMV Well, yesterday I got hot tempered again with one of my neighbors, and I'd like to see the collective opinion of you guys if y'all think it was justified or not. I currently live in a town home, and my "backyard area" is shared among three units in particular. It's not a big enclosure, but you make do with what you have. Yesterday, the neighbor two units over (and sharing the backyard area) up and decided to put a huge-arse trampoline there that quite literally consumes just about all the available non-porch space in the backyard area for all three units. I wasn't a fan of these people to start with, but after seeing that (and considering this guy didn't even bother to ask the other two of us if that was ok), I pretty much lost it and banged on his door and let him have it. Granted, there's not much I can do after venting that's legal. So, now I'm calling the housing association for the town homes and so forth to get this resolved. So my question to CP is, considering the obvious disrespect for other people when taking up all their space without even asking, do y'all think I was out of line for banging on his door and letting him have it? I don't, but then again I'm not one known for keeping the peace.

                      Jeremy Falcon

                      S Offline
                      S Offline
                      Slacker007
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #41

                      As a father, I wouldn't yell at another father with kids around, unless it was warranted and wouldn't want it done to me. I think you definitely made the correct choice to speak to him man to man, but any hostility on you part may not have been acceptable. Also, if you came knocking on my door and yelled at me, I would close the door in your face. If you pushed the issue I would be arrested for assault and battery, especially if my kids were around. Just saying.

                      J 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • J Jeremy Falcon

                        Anyone that knows me, may be aware that at times, I may or may not have a not-so-rational hot temper. I'd like to think it's because I am wise and mature and all-knowing, well beyond my years. YMMV Well, yesterday I got hot tempered again with one of my neighbors, and I'd like to see the collective opinion of you guys if y'all think it was justified or not. I currently live in a town home, and my "backyard area" is shared among three units in particular. It's not a big enclosure, but you make do with what you have. Yesterday, the neighbor two units over (and sharing the backyard area) up and decided to put a huge-arse trampoline there that quite literally consumes just about all the available non-porch space in the backyard area for all three units. I wasn't a fan of these people to start with, but after seeing that (and considering this guy didn't even bother to ask the other two of us if that was ok), I pretty much lost it and banged on his door and let him have it. Granted, there's not much I can do after venting that's legal. So, now I'm calling the housing association for the town homes and so forth to get this resolved. So my question to CP is, considering the obvious disrespect for other people when taking up all their space without even asking, do y'all think I was out of line for banging on his door and letting him have it? I don't, but then again I'm not one known for keeping the peace.

                        Jeremy Falcon

                        R Offline
                        R Offline
                        Ravi Bhavnani
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #42

                        IMHO, venting at the offender affords immediate gratification as it offers an outlet for one's anger or annoyance.  But it usually makes things worse, not better.  You may have gotten a better result by talking to the other neighbor and both of you quietly knocking on the offender's door and requesting him to move or take down the trampoline.  The offender may still be a twit in your opinion, but at least a twit who responded to your request to remove the monstrosity from the common area shared with other neighbors. :) /ravi

                        My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                        J 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • J Jeremy Falcon

                          P0mpey3 wrote:

                          But the fact it's a Trampoline suggests he probably has very small kids, like me. If you had come round my house banging on my door and shouting at me I would probably hit you (as long as your not big and muscly or anything).

                          You are correct with the assumption of him having kids. Although I didn't see any behind the door when I was around. I'm sure my voice may have carried, but I wouldn't deliberately do that in front of kids. That being said, I still don't think I was in the wrong, having kids or not. I didn't yell in front of the kids or to his wife. It was man to man. He's an adult and he should act like one.

                          Jeremy Falcon

                          R Offline
                          R Offline
                          Ravi Bhavnani
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #43

                          Jeremy Falcon wrote:

                          He's an adult and he should act like one.

                          Ahem...  :) /ravi

                          My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

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                          • L Lost User

                            We're going to need more details: - Were voices raised? - Was swearing involved? - Any direct insults to his wife or children? - Any threats of bodily harm? - Were any weapons drawn? - Did the word "lawyer" get muttered?

                            Contrary to popular belief, nobody owes you anything.

                            R Offline
                            R Offline
                            Ravi Bhavnani
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #44

                            Mike, are your services available for hire? :-D /ravi

                            My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                            L 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • R Ravi Bhavnani

                              Mike, are your services available for hire? :-D /ravi

                              My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                              L Offline
                              L Offline
                              Lost User
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #45

                              Ravi Bhavnani wrote:

                              Mike, are your services available for hire?

                              Absolutely! But my rates are epic! :-D

                              Contrary to popular belief, nobody owes you anything.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • S Slacker007

                                As a father, I wouldn't yell at another father with kids around, unless it was warranted and wouldn't want it done to me. I think you definitely made the correct choice to speak to him man to man, but any hostility on you part may not have been acceptable. Also, if you came knocking on my door and yelled at me, I would close the door in your face. If you pushed the issue I would be arrested for assault and battery, especially if my kids were around. Just saying.

                                J Offline
                                J Offline
                                Jeremy Falcon
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #46

                                His kids weren't around. I'm not that cold man.

                                Jeremy Falcon

                                S 1 Reply Last reply
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                                • Sander RosselS Sander Rossel

                                  Jeremy Falcon wrote:

                                  Didn't say I was a coward either.

                                  Admitting you were wrong is only for the bravest of the brave :D

                                  Jeremy Falcon wrote:

                                  I don't intend to make friends with people like that.

                                  You don't have to. You're just going to have a friendly talk with him, and a few beers, about his trampoline. You'll catch more flies with honey than vinegar and all that.

                                  Visit my blog at Sander's bits - Writing the code you need. Or read my articles at my CodeProject profile.

                                  Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability. — Edsger W. Dijkstra

                                  Regards, Sander

                                  J Offline
                                  J Offline
                                  Jeremy Falcon
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #47

                                  Sander Rossel wrote:

                                  Admitting you were wrong is only for the bravest of the brave

                                  I was wrong for the name calling, but I wasn't wrong about not being happy. He was wrong with that.

                                  Jeremy Falcon

                                  Sander RosselS 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • R Ravi Bhavnani

                                    IMHO, venting at the offender affords immediate gratification as it offers an outlet for one's anger or annoyance.  But it usually makes things worse, not better.  You may have gotten a better result by talking to the other neighbor and both of you quietly knocking on the offender's door and requesting him to move or take down the trampoline.  The offender may still be a twit in your opinion, but at least a twit who responded to your request to remove the monstrosity from the common area shared with other neighbors. :) /ravi

                                    My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                                    J Offline
                                    J Offline
                                    Jeremy Falcon
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #48

                                    I know you're right man. +5

                                    Jeremy Falcon

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                                    • J Jeremy Falcon

                                      Sander Rossel wrote:

                                      Admitting you were wrong is only for the bravest of the brave

                                      I was wrong for the name calling, but I wasn't wrong about not being happy. He was wrong with that.

                                      Jeremy Falcon

                                      Sander RosselS Offline
                                      Sander RosselS Offline
                                      Sander Rossel
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #49

                                      Well, you know, be the better man and all that. Perhaps I just have no spine, pride and honor. Which is really convenient when dealing with people though :laugh:

                                      Visit my blog at Sander's bits - Writing the code you need. Or read my articles at my CodeProject profile.

                                      Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability. — Edsger W. Dijkstra

                                      Regards, Sander

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • R Ravi Bhavnani

                                        Jeremy Falcon wrote:

                                        He's an adult and he should act like one.

                                        Ahem...  :) /ravi

                                        My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536 Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

                                        J Offline
                                        J Offline
                                        Jeremy Falcon
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #50

                                        :-D Touché!

                                        Jeremy Falcon

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                                        • C Colin Mullikin

                                          For my own future reference, does CP also have a mushroom emoticon to go with the badger?

                                          The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

                                          P Offline
                                          P Offline
                                          PIEBALDconsult
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #51

                                          { A snake } A snake.

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