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  3. Chronic low self-esteem?

Chronic low self-esteem?

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • J Jamie Hale

    Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J

    "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

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    Shog9 0
    wrote on last edited by
    #16

    Standing out on my back porch watching a cigarette burn into my fingers until i'm ready to face the rest of the world again.

    Shog9

    drifting along with the tumbling tumbleweeds...

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    • R rondalescott

      Actually it was Paxil that did the trick for me!

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      Paul Lyons
      wrote on last edited by
      #17

      Ditto! Still on it. :-D

      Paul Lyons, CCPL
      Certified Code Project Lurker


      What a long, strange trip it's been. - Robert Hunter

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      • D Daniel Turini

        Jamie Hale wrote: Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? Some people use Viagra :-D I had exactly the opposite problem. I was overly confident on myself. And then, I humbly looked for professional help. It worked: now, I'm perfect, almost a god. ORACLE One Real A$#h%le Called Lary Ellison

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        David Wulff
        wrote on last edited by
        #18

        :)


        David Wulff

        "It is a helpless feeling to be unable to make something so terribly wrong... right."

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        • L l a u r e n

          "give me the power to change the things i can change and accept the things i cant change"


          "penguins have no bill"
          biz stuff   about me

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          Navin
          wrote on last edited by
          #19

          ... and wisdom to know the difference. :) "When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute and it's longer than any hour. That's relativity." - Albert Einstein

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          • S Shog9 0

            "...to bury the bodies of those who get in my way where they'll never be found..."

            Shog9

            drifting along with the tumbling tumbleweeds...

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            N Offline
            Navin
            wrote on last edited by
            #20

            :-D "When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute and it's longer than any hour. That's relativity." - Albert Einstein

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            • A Anonymous

              Actually, John, I still maintain that starting threads in your profile forum so that people can explain to you exactly why they like you is a perfect example of a lack of self confidence. Is it fair to say that your outpouring of abuse is your way of coping?

              realJSOPR Offline
              realJSOPR Offline
              realJSOP
              wrote on last edited by
              #21

              I was making sport (that's part of my dry wit). If I was truly concerned about what people thought of me, I wouldn't have provided both questions. You can think what you want and try to over-analize anything I might do, but like everyone else here, you're not qualified to comment on my state of mind, level of self-esteem or anything else like that. So, blow me. :) ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

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              • J Jamie Hale

                Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J

                "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

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                R Offline
                Ray Cassick
                wrote on last edited by
                #22

                I found that by keeping a journal of all the positive thnings that I had accomplished and reflecting back on that when I was feeling low and it helped me remember the things that I WAS able to accomplish in the past. When we get depressed we tend to forget all the positive things that we HAVE done in the past and only focus on the current bad situations or our current low self image. I would recomend that that you also consider picking up a few CDs that can help. I HIGHLY recomend Anthony Robbins. Even if you don't belive in what he says, his actions and voice and words are enought o get your mind stirring in the right direction.


                Paul Watson wrote: "At the end of the day it is what you produce that counts, not how many doctorates you have on the wall." George Carlin wrote: "Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things." Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote: If the physicists find a universal theory describing the laws of universe, I'm sure the asshole constant will be an integral part of that theory.


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                • J Jamie Hale

                  Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J

                  "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

                  J Offline
                  J Offline
                  Jeremy Falcon
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #23

                  Identify your insecurities and then get rid of them. Me, I used to fat, and I was insecure about it. Well, I lost the fat! Seems simple, but few rarely do it. It's liberating actually. Jeremy Falcon

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                  • J Jamie Hale

                    Hmmm. Trick is, the implied "God" that precedes that quote is where I have trouble. While I do believe in god, I don't feel it's his problem to solve - it's mine. How does one go about gathering the power to accept that which I cannot change? J

                    "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

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                    Tom Archer
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #24

                    The point of the Serenity Prayer is that there is a higher power that made you who you are (regardless of what you call that higher power) and that you are not asking it to solve your problems for you - the key words in that prayer or "grant me the serenty, the courage and the wisdom". Nowhere does it state that the higher power will be doing anything other than enabling you to take care of your own situations. Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"

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                    • J Jamie Hale

                      Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J

                      "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

                      L Offline
                      L Offline
                      Lost User
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #25

                      Jamie Hale wrote: What do you do to cope? Once when a wiser older co-worker and myself stumbled upon a screwed up jumble of poorly engineered equipment that we had to fix, I started ranting and raving about it and generally getting all pissed off, he said: "At 80 feet long and weighing over 100 tons the Blue whale is the largest mammal to ever inhabit the earth, yet it's throat opening is no bigger around than yours or mine. There's nothing the whale can do about it. So stop screaming about what 'should be' and hand me a damn wrench." 'nuff said.


                      Work like you don't need the money.
                      Love like you've never been hurt.
                      Dance like nobody's watching.

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                      • P Paul Lyons

                        Jamie, While I don't consider myself to be a religous person... I learned the serenity prayer attending Alateen[^] as a teenager. The key here is to continually remind yourself that there is only so much in life that you have direct control over. Anyway, the real reason for the reply is to ask if you've ever been screened for depression[^]? (I don't mean to imply anything. Just a thought.) I too had the same problem! Long story short, Major Depression can manifest itself in many ways... I am proof the there is better living through chemicals :laugh:. p.s. Alice's Resturant -> There's a blast from the past :-O Man, I'm getting old!

                        Paul Lyons, CCPL
                        Certified Code Project Lurker


                        What a long strange trip it's been - Robert Hunter

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                        Tom Archer
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #26

                        Coolness Paul. I go to Al-Anon and interpret for the deaf-sober AA meeting. Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"

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                        • P Paul Lyons

                          Ditto! Still on it. :-D

                          Paul Lyons, CCPL
                          Certified Code Project Lurker


                          What a long, strange trip it's been. - Robert Hunter

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                          Christopher Duncan
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #27

                          Paul Lyons wrote: What a long, strange trip it's been. - Robert Hunter The Grateful Dead ("Truckin'") Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)

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                          • D Daniel Turini

                            Jamie Hale wrote: Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? Some people use Viagra :-D I had exactly the opposite problem. I was overly confident on myself. And then, I humbly looked for professional help. It worked: now, I'm perfect, almost a god. ORACLE One Real A$#h%le Called Lary Ellison

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                            Tom Archer
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #28

                            Um. Glad to see you got over that over-confidence issue :) Actually, for me personally, I find that one my greatest traits is my almost God-like humility and modesty. Hey maybe you and I should start a club or something :cool: Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"

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                            • L Lost User

                              Jamie Hale wrote: What do you do to cope? Once when a wiser older co-worker and myself stumbled upon a screwed up jumble of poorly engineered equipment that we had to fix, I started ranting and raving about it and generally getting all pissed off, he said: "At 80 feet long and weighing over 100 tons the Blue whale is the largest mammal to ever inhabit the earth, yet it's throat opening is no bigger around than yours or mine. There's nothing the whale can do about it. So stop screaming about what 'should be' and hand me a damn wrench." 'nuff said.


                              Work like you don't need the money.
                              Love like you've never been hurt.
                              Dance like nobody's watching.

                              T Offline
                              T Offline
                              Tom Archer
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #29

                              Definitely stops you in your tracks. Nice one. Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"

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                              • J Jamie Hale

                                Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J

                                "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

                                C Offline
                                C Offline
                                Chris Losinger
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #30

                                Jamie Hale wrote: What do you do to cope? strong drinks long naps staring glassy-eyed into the distance hoping for the end To vote with no response is to follow the way of the coward.

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                                • T Tom Archer

                                  Definitely stops you in your tracks. Nice one. Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"

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                                  Tim Smith
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #31

                                  Same here. I am stopped dead in my tracks wondering what the point of the statement might be. Given how the whale feeds, he has little need for a larger opening. Then again, I was never much on dime store philosophy. Tim Smith I'm going to patent thought. I have yet to see any prior art.

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                                  • J Jamie Hale

                                    Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J

                                    "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

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                                    M Offline
                                    Marc Clifton
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #32

                                    Jamie Hale wrote: Anyone else here suffer from this? No. Jamie Hale wrote: What do you do to cope? Go to the mall and watch the people. Instant low self-esteem cure. :-D Marc Help! I'm an AI running around in someone's f*cked up universe simulator.
                                    Sensitivity and ethnic diversity means celebrating difference, not hiding from it. - Christian Graus
                                    Every line of code is a liability - Taka Muraoka
                                    Microsoft deliberately adds arbitrary layers of complexity to make it difficult to deliver Windows features on non-Windows platforms--Microsoft's "Halloween files"

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                                    • J Jamie Hale

                                      Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J

                                      "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

                                      J Offline
                                      J Offline
                                      John M Drescher
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #33

                                      I used to for years. Until I learned from women that I am one hell of a catch even though I am not the best looking guy in the world. This will give you confidence and women will notice it. And then what you thought as impossible (finding an attractive woman) becomes easy.... John

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                                      • realJSOPR realJSOP

                                        I was making sport (that's part of my dry wit). If I was truly concerned about what people thought of me, I wouldn't have provided both questions. You can think what you want and try to over-analize anything I might do, but like everyone else here, you're not qualified to comment on my state of mind, level of self-esteem or anything else like that. So, blow me. :) ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends

                                        J Offline
                                        J Offline
                                        Jamie Hale
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #34

                                        John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: So, blow me. Drop 'em, cutie. J

                                        "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

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                                        • J Jamie Hale

                                          Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J

                                          "You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."

                                          Z Offline
                                          Z Offline
                                          Zachery
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #35

                                          You have to wallow in it and thrive off it. I don't consider my self-esteem low, I feel I have an accurate portrayal of myself. But, I find that keeping your esteem low (or realistic) no one can really say anything about you that will get to you too much. I find that if you're true to yourself, say F everyone else's opinion, you'll be good to go. Drugs also help.

                                          ..........Zack.......... Developer Extraordinaire && Full Time Geek

                                          "Don't go out of your way to step on people's toes, but don't stop walking all-together." GCS\P\SS d- s-:- a-- C++$ U--- P--- L- E- W++ N o K-? w+++ O++ !M-- V PS+ PE Y+ PGP t+ 5+ X+ R++ tv++ b++ DI++ D+++ G+>G++++ e* h- r++ y+

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