Chronic low self-esteem?
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Jamie, While I don't consider myself to be a religous person... I learned the serenity prayer attending Alateen[^] as a teenager. The key here is to continually remind yourself that there is only so much in life that you have direct control over. Anyway, the real reason for the reply is to ask if you've ever been screened for depression[^]? (I don't mean to imply anything. Just a thought.) I too had the same problem! Long story short, Major Depression can manifest itself in many ways... I am proof the there is better living through chemicals :laugh:. p.s. Alice's Resturant -> There's a blast from the past :-O Man, I'm getting old!
Paul Lyons, CCPL
Certified Code Project Lurker
What a long strange trip it's been - Robert Hunter
Coolness Paul. I go to Al-Anon and interpret for the deaf-sober AA meeting. Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"
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Ditto! Still on it. :-D
Paul Lyons, CCPL
Certified Code Project Lurker
What a long, strange trip it's been. - Robert Hunter
Paul Lyons wrote: What a long, strange trip it's been. - Robert Hunter The Grateful Dead ("Truckin'") Chistopher Duncan Author - The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World (Apress)
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Jamie Hale wrote: Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? Some people use Viagra :-D I had exactly the opposite problem. I was overly confident on myself. And then, I humbly looked for professional help. It worked: now, I'm perfect, almost a god. ORACLE One Real A$#h%le Called Lary Ellison
Um. Glad to see you got over that over-confidence issue :) Actually, for me personally, I find that one my greatest traits is my almost God-like humility and modesty. Hey maybe you and I should start a club or something :cool: Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"
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Jamie Hale wrote: What do you do to cope? Once when a wiser older co-worker and myself stumbled upon a screwed up jumble of poorly engineered equipment that we had to fix, I started ranting and raving about it and generally getting all pissed off, he said: "At 80 feet long and weighing over 100 tons the Blue whale is the largest mammal to ever inhabit the earth, yet it's throat opening is no bigger around than yours or mine. There's nothing the whale can do about it. So stop screaming about what 'should be' and hand me a damn wrench." 'nuff said.
Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.Definitely stops you in your tracks. Nice one. Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"
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Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
Jamie Hale wrote: What do you do to cope? strong drinks long naps staring glassy-eyed into the distance hoping for the end To vote with no response is to follow the way of the coward.
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Definitely stops you in your tracks. Nice one. Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"
Same here. I am stopped dead in my tracks wondering what the point of the statement might be. Given how the whale feeds, he has little need for a larger opening. Then again, I was never much on dime store philosophy. Tim Smith I'm going to patent thought. I have yet to see any prior art.
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Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
Jamie Hale wrote: Anyone else here suffer from this? No. Jamie Hale wrote: What do you do to cope? Go to the mall and watch the people. Instant low self-esteem cure. :-D Marc Help! I'm an AI running around in someone's f*cked up universe simulator.
Sensitivity and ethnic diversity means celebrating difference, not hiding from it. - Christian Graus
Every line of code is a liability - Taka Muraoka
Microsoft deliberately adds arbitrary layers of complexity to make it difficult to deliver Windows features on non-Windows platforms--Microsoft's "Halloween files" -
Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
I used to for years. Until I learned from women that I am one hell of a catch even though I am not the best looking guy in the world. This will give you confidence and women will notice it. And then what you thought as impossible (finding an attractive woman) becomes easy.... John
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I was making sport (that's part of my dry wit). If I was truly concerned about what people thought of me, I wouldn't have provided both questions. You can think what you want and try to over-analize anything I might do, but like everyone else here, you're not qualified to comment on my state of mind, level of self-esteem or anything else like that. So, blow me. :) ------- signature starts "...the staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - Jason Jystad, 10/26/2001 Please review the Legal Disclaimer in my bio. ------- signature ends
John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: So, blow me. Drop 'em, cutie. J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
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Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
You have to wallow in it and thrive off it. I don't consider my self-esteem low, I feel I have an accurate portrayal of myself. But, I find that keeping your esteem low (or realistic) no one can really say anything about you that will get to you too much. I find that if you're true to yourself, say F everyone else's opinion, you'll be good to go. Drugs also help.
..........Zack.......... Developer Extraordinaire && Full Time Geek
"Don't go out of your way to step on people's toes, but don't stop walking all-together." GCS\P\SS d- s-:- a-- C++$ U--- P--- L- E- W++ N o K-? w+++ O++ !M-- V PS+ PE Y+ PGP t+ 5+ X+ R++ tv++ b++ DI++ D+++ G+>G++++ e* h- r++ y+
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Same here. I am stopped dead in my tracks wondering what the point of the statement might be. Given how the whale feeds, he has little need for a larger opening. Then again, I was never much on dime store philosophy. Tim Smith I'm going to patent thought. I have yet to see any prior art.
Tim Smith wrote: Given how the whale feeds, he has little need for a larger opening. It's not for food. :suss: ;)
David Wulff
"It is a helpless feeling to be unable to make something so terribly wrong... right."
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The point of the Serenity Prayer is that there is a higher power that made you who you are (regardless of what you call that higher power) and that you are not asking it to solve your problems for you - the key words in that prayer or "grant me the serenty, the courage and the wisdom". Nowhere does it state that the higher power will be doing anything other than enabling you to take care of your own situations. Cheers, Tom Archer, Inside C# Mainstream is just a word for the way things always have been -- just a middle-of-the-road, tow-the-line thing; a front for the Man serving up the same warmed-over slop he did yesterday and expecting you to say, "Thank you sir, may I have another?"
Alright. :) I pondered the actual prayer over lunch, and I think within it is some direction for me. Thanks for the input. J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
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John Simmons / outlaw programmer wrote: So, blow me. Drop 'em, cutie. J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
Thanks for the mental image. There goes the appetite for lunch ;) cheers, Chris Maunder
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Hmmm. Trick is, the implied "God" that precedes that quote is where I have trouble. While I do believe in god, I don't feel it's his problem to solve - it's mine. How does one go about gathering the power to accept that which I cannot change? J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
By putting it in perspective. cheers, Chris Maunder
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Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
I'm pretty sure this is normal for most geekish types :) After 12 years at school knowing very few people with the same interests, it's bound to happen. I'm pretty sure that's why we're all drawn to CP so much - it's a relief to find people we can relate to. I know my body language isn't always "normal", probably due to a poor attempt at hiding shyness. I usually cope with this by making jokes (often out of place). But at the same time, I'm not too bothered if people don't understand me - I like being on my own, it gives me time to think, contemplate and enjoy my own company :) One thing I can suggest, is smile (but not too enthusiastically). Being different from the norm doesn't make someone a nasty person, it just makes them unusual. While I don't mind people misunderstanding me, it would bother me if someone thought I was cruel or uncaring. Don't feel alone :rose: What do you do to cope btw?
To honor you, and your sick games, this smiley ;p will now represent licking chocolate off candy - David Chamberlain
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Jamie Hale wrote: Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? Some people use Viagra :-D I had exactly the opposite problem. I was overly confident on myself. And then, I humbly looked for professional help. It worked: now, I'm perfect, almost a god. ORACLE One Real A$#h%le Called Lary Ellison
Daniel, meet John. John, this is Daniel. You two have a lot in common. :rolleyes:
Software Zen:
delete this; -
Identify your insecurities and then get rid of them. Me, I used to fat, and I was insecure about it. Well, I lost the fat! Seems simple, but few rarely do it. It's liberating actually. Jeremy Falcon
I believe this is part of my problem. I'm not sure what my insecurities are. I've been trying to figure it out, but when I look back at my life, I can identify times very early on where I've lashed out or tried to overcompensate for a lack of confidence. To me, this means I've been dealing with this stuff for a bunch of years. One completely vain possibility is that I feel I've been alienated most my life because I'm a red-head. I'm sure it's a self-imposed feeling of alienation, but real nonetheless. And simply dying my hair isn't going to accomplish anything. :) J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
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Anyone else here suffer from this? What do you do to cope? J
"You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant."
Over my lifetime I have observed that people with low self esteem are usually right.;)
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And the wisdom to tell them apart :rose: Elaine (philosophical fluffy tigress) The tigress is here :-D
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Jamie Hale wrote: What do you do to cope? Once when a wiser older co-worker and myself stumbled upon a screwed up jumble of poorly engineered equipment that we had to fix, I started ranting and raving about it and generally getting all pissed off, he said: "At 80 feet long and weighing over 100 tons the Blue whale is the largest mammal to ever inhabit the earth, yet it's throat opening is no bigger around than yours or mine. There's nothing the whale can do about it. So stop screaming about what 'should be' and hand me a damn wrench." 'nuff said.
Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.Excellent, and a 5 :cool: The tigress is here :-D
