How to explain things to management
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How do you explain things to your manager ? I find a number of phrases such as "There is nothing complicated about software. There are, however, five million simple things" help. Also, using non softwre terms without mangling what I'm trying to communicate helps. Any ideas/comments/jokes/horror stories ? Elaine :rose: The tigress is here :-D
Have you seen the current Microsoft (Windows 2003 Server) ads in the UK? For anyone who hasn't, they essentially go like this: Management Guy: So, what have you been doing? Tech Guy: Wibbler Enabling Dongles and..... MG: (looking confused) TG: ... and Thingy Doodad Activation and... MG: Uhhhh TG: ... and Quantum Virtual Services and ... MG: (BOFH style stack overflow) TG: ... and it's going to save us infinity squared dollars a year. MG: *DINGDINGDINGDINGDING* Really!?! (cut to scene of random office workers dancing about, followed by Microsoft branding and slogan "Do More With Less") -- Ian Darling "The moral of the story is that with a contrived example, you can prove anything." - Joel Spolsky
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How do you explain things to your manager ? I find a number of phrases such as "There is nothing complicated about software. There are, however, five million simple things" help. Also, using non softwre terms without mangling what I'm trying to communicate helps. Any ideas/comments/jokes/horror stories ? Elaine :rose: The tigress is here :-D
Trollslayer wrote: How do you explain things to your manager ? Never try to teach a pig to whistle. You waste your time, and annoy the pig. "Your village called -
They're missing their idiot." -
Surely no self respecting Frenchman is going to use an American implement, right? Wouldn't you rather use an errr... an err... hmm... What sports has France invented BTW? Oh, Croquet, come to think of it a Croquet mallet could be pretty effective. regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass South Africa Brian Welsch wrote: "blah blah blah, maybe a potato?" while translating my Afrikaans. Crikey! ain't life grand?
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Have you seen the current Microsoft (Windows 2003 Server) ads in the UK? For anyone who hasn't, they essentially go like this: Management Guy: So, what have you been doing? Tech Guy: Wibbler Enabling Dongles and..... MG: (looking confused) TG: ... and Thingy Doodad Activation and... MG: Uhhhh TG: ... and Quantum Virtual Services and ... MG: (BOFH style stack overflow) TG: ... and it's going to save us infinity squared dollars a year. MG: *DINGDINGDINGDINGDING* Really!?! (cut to scene of random office workers dancing about, followed by Microsoft branding and slogan "Do More With Less") -- Ian Darling "The moral of the story is that with a contrived example, you can prove anything." - Joel Spolsky
>"Do More With Less" Crikey, did you see that Dilbert cartoon that had that the other day? regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass South Africa Brian Welsch wrote: "blah blah blah, maybe a potato?" while translating my Afrikaans. Crikey! ain't life grand?
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>"Do More With Less" Crikey, did you see that Dilbert cartoon that had that the other day? regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass South Africa Brian Welsch wrote: "blah blah blah, maybe a potato?" while translating my Afrikaans. Crikey! ain't life grand?
Yes[^] -- Ian Darling "The moral of the story is that with a contrived example, you can prove anything." - Joel Spolsky
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KaЯl wrote: * Also, the first car race in history was Paris-Rouen, in 1894. Now, explaining things to management with a racecar... that sounds interesting!
Shog9 ---
You'd better turn back, before the frost sets in. These desert nights are for weathered men, The ones who've already given in...
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How do you explain things to your manager ? I find a number of phrases such as "There is nothing complicated about software. There are, however, five million simple things" help. Also, using non softwre terms without mangling what I'm trying to communicate helps. Any ideas/comments/jokes/horror stories ? Elaine :rose: The tigress is here :-D
Trollslayer wrote: How do you explain things to your manager ? I don't. In fact, i pray to god to swap my position with my manager.... :) Weiye, Chen When pursuing your dreams, don't forget to enjoy your life...
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How do you explain things to your manager ? I find a number of phrases such as "There is nothing complicated about software. There are, however, five million simple things" help. Also, using non softwre terms without mangling what I'm trying to communicate helps. Any ideas/comments/jokes/horror stories ? Elaine :rose: The tigress is here :-D
I've worked out that if I talk to my manager about how I'm planning to do a task he will get confused, come up with nonsensical ideas and schemes to perform a task and expect me to use what he's suggested. However if I just quietly get on and do the work then show my manager when its completed he's quite happy with the result. Jim
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Trollslayer wrote: How do you explain things to your manager ? I don't. In fact, i pray to god to swap my position with my manager.... :) Weiye, Chen When pursuing your dreams, don't forget to enjoy your life...
You don't want their job, trust me. regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass South Africa Brian Welsch wrote: "blah blah blah, maybe a potato?" while translating my Afrikaans. Crikey! ain't life grand?
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How do you explain things to your manager ? I find a number of phrases such as "There is nothing complicated about software. There are, however, five million simple things" help. Also, using non softwre terms without mangling what I'm trying to communicate helps. Any ideas/comments/jokes/horror stories ? Elaine :rose: The tigress is here :-D
Our non-technical MD, explaining how "simple" software, and in particular crunching binary numbers are in his view, to an overbusy R&D department, said: "Well, it's easy... it's all just 1s and 2s". We've never let him forget that. S
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Paul Watson wrote: Surely no self respecting Frenchman is going to use an American implement, right? For the selected function, I do not think they would have a problem. Now to hit a ball with could be a different matter. But that is just my perception. "For as long as I can remember, I have had memories. Colin Mochrie."
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ProffK wrote: but I am itching to tell mine that he tries to make a baby in one month by getting nine mothers on the job. lol :laugh: Brilliant. I'm in a lecture now and I've just burst out laughing... getting some strange looks here.... Regards, Brian Dela :-) http://www.briandela.com IE 6 required.
http://www.briandela.com/pictures Now with a pictures section :-D
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MFC.NET Application Wizard Mix .NETBrian Delahunty wrote: I'm in a lecture now and I've just burst out laughing... If you are receiving the lecture, then shame on you! You should be paying attention. If you are giving the lecture, then um, err, more shame on you! Iain. ps. Pratchett books used to have the same "get the strait jacket, Bob!" effects on me.
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KaЯl wrote: With a Baseball bat Can not get them by the security gaurds here. :~ "For as long as I can remember, I have had memories. Colin Mochrie."
Michael A. Barnhart wrote: Can not get them by the security gaurds here Tell them its a "highly calibrated executive enlightenment doohickey". And slip past while they're looking for the aspirin... Iain.
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How do you explain things to your manager ? I find a number of phrases such as "There is nothing complicated about software. There are, however, five million simple things" help. Also, using non softwre terms without mangling what I'm trying to communicate helps. Any ideas/comments/jokes/horror stories ? Elaine :rose: The tigress is here :-D
Sock puppet. :-D j/k My manager is fantastic.
Jon Sagara Vegetarianism is unhealthy. Humans need protein, and lots of it. Put down those sprouts and pick up a T-bone! -- Michael Moore
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How do you explain things to your manager ? I find a number of phrases such as "There is nothing complicated about software. There are, however, five million simple things" help. Also, using non softwre terms without mangling what I'm trying to communicate helps. Any ideas/comments/jokes/horror stories ? Elaine :rose: The tigress is here :-D
A lot of tricks and advices in "Guerilla tactics for an imperfect World"[^], by our CPian fellow Chrstopher Duncan: Chapter 10: "Managing your managment" - Improving communication - Institution change - Bolstering your position - Frontal Assault (for those who respond to reason) - Stealth tactics (when reason is not enough) - Credibility, the key to success No, it's not an advertisement, it's a tip. :-D
Silence Means Death Stand On Your Feet Inner Fear Your Worst Enemy
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I don't know anymore, but the next time my boss asks me if we can programme in Word* I am getting him one of these. *And no, he does not mean applications that use Word, he means do we use Word to write C#/VBScript/HTML/CSS etc. regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass South Africa Brian Welsch wrote: "blah blah blah, maybe a potato?" while translating my Afrikaans. Crikey! ain't life grand?
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You mean they have hell on their map? Impressive! ;) hehe regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass South Africa Brian Welsch wrote: "blah blah blah, maybe a potato?" while translating my Afrikaans. Crikey! ain't life grand?
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You mean they have hell on their map? Impressive! ;) hehe regards, Paul Watson Bluegrass South Africa Brian Welsch wrote: "blah blah blah, maybe a potato?" while translating my Afrikaans. Crikey! ain't life grand?
Yes, there is a Hell, Michigan[^] and Hell, Michigan[^] - it even freezes over almost every year[^]..really :cool: Steve
