How to write unmaintainable code and keep your job for life
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
That's a gem thanks. I love the part about writing comments only for the trivial parts..
John
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That's a gem thanks. I love the part about writing comments only for the trivial parts..
John
One of the funniest things is to run across trivial comments that are wrong!
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
sounds like he and i have worked with the same handful of developers. small world.
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
Nemanja Trifunovic wrote:
Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable
Hey! I resemble that remark! :~ Marc
I'm not overthinking the problem, I just felt like I needed a small, unimportant, uninteresting rant! - Martin Hart Turner
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Nemanja Trifunovic wrote:
Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable
Hey! I resemble that remark! :~ Marc
I'm not overthinking the problem, I just felt like I needed a small, unimportant, uninteresting rant! - Martin Hart Turner
Inter*cough*? ;)
-- Kein Mitleid Für Die Mehrheit
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Inter*cough*? ;)
-- Kein Mitleid Für Die Mehrheit
Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote:
Inter*cough*?
:-D And others too. I seem to have a pension for frameworks! Marc
I'm not overthinking the problem, I just felt like I needed a small, unimportant, uninteresting rant! - Martin Hart Turner
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Jörgen Sigvardsson wrote:
Inter*cough*?
:-D And others too. I seem to have a pension for frameworks! Marc
I'm not overthinking the problem, I just felt like I needed a small, unimportant, uninteresting rant! - Martin Hart Turner
I have a penchant for them, and they are your pension????
"WPF has many lovers. It's a veritable porn star!" - Josh Smith
As Braveheart once said, "You can take our freedom but you'll never take our Hobnobs!" - Martin Hughes.
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I have a penchant for them, and they are your pension????
"WPF has many lovers. It's a veritable porn star!" - Josh Smith
As Braveheart once said, "You can take our freedom but you'll never take our Hobnobs!" - Martin Hughes.
Pete O'Hanlon wrote:
I have a penchant for them, and they are your pension????
You know, I KNEW there something wrong with that word, but I couldn't figure out what. Thanks! Now I know what word I meant to use! Marc
I'm not overthinking the problem, I just felt like I needed a small, unimportant, uninteresting rant! - Martin Hart Turner
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
So that's why Yahoo is going under - sounds logical. BTW, this guy has scene of humor and he definitely has had some hard time in Yahoo.
The narrow specialist in the broad sense of the word is a complete idiot in the narrow sense of the word. Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.
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One of the funniest things is to run across trivial comments that are wrong!
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
It can be done much simpler: Just don't document anything ever. Claim it is a waste of time. When the junior programmers come to ask about something, rant endlessly about the CPU flags or just say that you are buisy. "The documentation is the code". X| Yes, I am bitter!
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It can be done much simpler: Just don't document anything ever. Claim it is a waste of time. When the junior programmers come to ask about something, rant endlessly about the CPU flags or just say that you are buisy. "The documentation is the code". X| Yes, I am bitter!
I hear ya.
Daniel Vaughan Follow me on Twitter Blog: DanielVaughan.Orpius.com Open Source Projects: Calcium SDK, Clog Organization: Outcoder of PebbleAge
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
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This made me laugh today[^]. My favorite part: Build a framework. When you build a framework, you inevitably become “the architect,” and your authority is unquestionable. Plus, it lets you add secret conventions — and lots of them, sometimes contradictory ones — that will trip up even the most experienced maintainer. Your framework will take care of everything. No one should bother understanding it; they should be happy you’re single-handedly making development easier and more productive for the whole company. Never release the framework as open source, because the framework is an asset to the company, and the open source community will poke fun at you, and that could be the end of your bluff.
Hahahaha...reminds me of places I've worked. At one shop a programmer used Disney characters as all his label names.
BALR 8, GOOFY
No comments. Another place the first thing you were told was "Names mean nothing". If this subroutine is named "Print", it may not get around to it.
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11
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Hahahaha...reminds me of places I've worked. At one shop a programmer used Disney characters as all his label names.
BALR 8, GOOFY
No comments. Another place the first thing you were told was "Names mean nothing". If this subroutine is named "Print", it may not get around to it.
Psychosis at 10 Film at 11
I'll admit I like to use cartoon characters for my class names(then I call the variable what the class is)
class BugsBunny {...}
class other()
{
BugsBunny PathFinding = new BugsBunny();
}if it doesn't make sense... I use the BugsBunny for finding paths
FindPath(Point FromHere, Point Albequerque){...}
.. But since I will probably be the only person to ever read my code(until I make serious money selling it and need a version 2.0) .. I just find it humerus...(and it is still a work in progress so often the path is wrong ;P )
I'd blame it on the Brain farts.. But lets be honest, it really is more like a Methane factory between my ears some days then it is anything else...
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It can be done much simpler: Just don't document anything ever. Claim it is a waste of time. When the junior programmers come to ask about something, rant endlessly about the CPU flags or just say that you are buisy. "The documentation is the code". X| Yes, I am bitter!
Haha, it's funny because it's true. I started a wiki at my work because I was tired of the lack of documentation. If they won't do it, you can always get started doing it for them.
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Pete O'Hanlon wrote:
I have a penchant for them, and they are your pension????
You know, I KNEW there something wrong with that word, but I couldn't figure out what. Thanks! Now I know what word I meant to use! Marc
I'm not overthinking the problem, I just felt like I needed a small, unimportant, uninteresting rant! - Martin Hart Turner