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Windows jokes

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  • L Offline
    L Offline
    LloydA111
    wrote on last edited by
    #1

    WinErr 001: Windows loaded - System in danger WinErr 002: No Error - Yet WinErr 003: Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file WinErr 004: Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive WinErr 007: System price error - Inadequate money spent on hardware WinErr 008: Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments WinErr 009: Horrible bug encountered - God knows what happened WinErr 00A: Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full WinErr 00B: Inadequate disk space - Free at least 50MB WinErr 00C: Memory hog error - More Ram needed. More! More! WinErr 00D: Window closed - Do not look outside WinErr 00E: Window open - Do not look inside WinErr 00F: Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened WinErr 010: Reserved for future mistakes by our developers WinErr 011: Window open - Do not look outside WinErr 012: Window closed - Do not look inside WinErr 013: Unexpected error - Huh ? WinErr 014: Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of. WinErr 018: Unrecoverable error - System destroyed. Buy new one. WinErr 019: User error - Not our fault. Is Not! Is Not! WinErr 01A: OS overwritten - Please reinstall all software. WinErr 01B: Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error. Next time you will suffer a penalty for that. WinErr 01C: Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate. WinErr 01D: System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code. WinErr 01E: Timing error - Please wait. And wait. And wait. And wait. WinErr 01F: Reserved for future mistakes of our developers. WinErr 020: Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be lost. WinErr 042: Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box. The virus, however, requires Windows. All tasks will automatically be closed and the virus will be activated again. WinErr 079: Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed. Please click the left mouse button to continue. WinErr 103: Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered. Additional errors may not be displayed or recorded. WinErr 678: This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? WinErr 683: Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the system to complete boot procedure. WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available. WinErr 912: Purchase a new copy of Windows today. Old license void. Windows has been deleted.

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    • L LloydA111

      WinErr 001: Windows loaded - System in danger WinErr 002: No Error - Yet WinErr 003: Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file WinErr 004: Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive WinErr 007: System price error - Inadequate money spent on hardware WinErr 008: Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments WinErr 009: Horrible bug encountered - God knows what happened WinErr 00A: Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full WinErr 00B: Inadequate disk space - Free at least 50MB WinErr 00C: Memory hog error - More Ram needed. More! More! WinErr 00D: Window closed - Do not look outside WinErr 00E: Window open - Do not look inside WinErr 00F: Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened WinErr 010: Reserved for future mistakes by our developers WinErr 011: Window open - Do not look outside WinErr 012: Window closed - Do not look inside WinErr 013: Unexpected error - Huh ? WinErr 014: Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of. WinErr 018: Unrecoverable error - System destroyed. Buy new one. WinErr 019: User error - Not our fault. Is Not! Is Not! WinErr 01A: OS overwritten - Please reinstall all software. WinErr 01B: Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error. Next time you will suffer a penalty for that. WinErr 01C: Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate. WinErr 01D: System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code. WinErr 01E: Timing error - Please wait. And wait. And wait. And wait. WinErr 01F: Reserved for future mistakes of our developers. WinErr 020: Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be lost. WinErr 042: Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box. The virus, however, requires Windows. All tasks will automatically be closed and the virus will be activated again. WinErr 079: Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed. Please click the left mouse button to continue. WinErr 103: Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered. Additional errors may not be displayed or recorded. WinErr 678: This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? WinErr 683: Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the system to complete boot procedure. WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available. WinErr 912: Purchase a new copy of Windows today. Old license void. Windows has been deleted.

      R Offline
      R Offline
      realJSOP
      wrote on last edited by
      #2

      Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

      WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive

      This is a list from 1989... I doubt if many of the younger people here even knoiw what DesqView is/was.

      .45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly
      -----
      "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
      -----
      "The staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - J. Jystad, 2001

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      • L LloydA111

        WinErr 001: Windows loaded - System in danger WinErr 002: No Error - Yet WinErr 003: Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file WinErr 004: Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive WinErr 007: System price error - Inadequate money spent on hardware WinErr 008: Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments WinErr 009: Horrible bug encountered - God knows what happened WinErr 00A: Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full WinErr 00B: Inadequate disk space - Free at least 50MB WinErr 00C: Memory hog error - More Ram needed. More! More! WinErr 00D: Window closed - Do not look outside WinErr 00E: Window open - Do not look inside WinErr 00F: Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened WinErr 010: Reserved for future mistakes by our developers WinErr 011: Window open - Do not look outside WinErr 012: Window closed - Do not look inside WinErr 013: Unexpected error - Huh ? WinErr 014: Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of. WinErr 018: Unrecoverable error - System destroyed. Buy new one. WinErr 019: User error - Not our fault. Is Not! Is Not! WinErr 01A: OS overwritten - Please reinstall all software. WinErr 01B: Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error. Next time you will suffer a penalty for that. WinErr 01C: Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate. WinErr 01D: System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code. WinErr 01E: Timing error - Please wait. And wait. And wait. And wait. WinErr 01F: Reserved for future mistakes of our developers. WinErr 020: Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be lost. WinErr 042: Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box. The virus, however, requires Windows. All tasks will automatically be closed and the virus will be activated again. WinErr 079: Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed. Please click the left mouse button to continue. WinErr 103: Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered. Additional errors may not be displayed or recorded. WinErr 678: This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? WinErr 683: Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the system to complete boot procedure. WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available. WinErr 912: Purchase a new copy of Windows today. Old license void. Windows has been deleted.

        C Offline
        C Offline
        CPallini
        wrote on last edited by
        #3

        ... WinErr FFE: No Error Code Left For Next Error Message. Winerr FFF: Ooops.... :-O :-D

        If the Lord God Almighty had consulted me before embarking upon the Creation, I would have recommended something simpler. -- Alfonso the Wise, 13th Century King of Castile.
        This is going on my arrogant assumptions. You may have a superb reason why I'm completely wrong. -- Iain Clarke
        [My articles]

        L 1 Reply Last reply
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        • R realJSOP

          Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

          WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive

          This is a list from 1989... I doubt if many of the younger people here even knoiw what DesqView is/was.

          .45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly
          -----
          "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
          -----
          "The staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - J. Jystad, 2001

          H Offline
          H Offline
          hayrob
          wrote on last edited by
          #4

          I'm older than you, and I had to look it up!

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • C CPallini

            ... WinErr FFE: No Error Code Left For Next Error Message. Winerr FFF: Ooops.... :-O :-D

            If the Lord God Almighty had consulted me before embarking upon the Creation, I would have recommended something simpler. -- Alfonso the Wise, 13th Century King of Castile.
            This is going on my arrogant assumptions. You may have a superb reason why I'm completely wrong. -- Iain Clarke
            [My articles]

            L Offline
            L Offline
            Luc Pattyn
            wrote on last edited by
            #5

            WinErr FFF: call GetLastWinErrEx() to obtain additional error code. :)

            Luc Pattyn [Forum Guidelines] [Why QA sucks] [My Articles]


            Happy New Year to all.
            We hope 2010 soon brings us automatic PRE tags!
            Until then, please insert them manually.


            0 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • R realJSOP

              Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

              WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive

              This is a list from 1989... I doubt if many of the younger people here even knoiw what DesqView is/was.

              .45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly
              -----
              "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
              -----
              "The staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - J. Jystad, 2001

              D Offline
              D Offline
              Dan Neely
              wrote on last edited by
              #6

              WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available.

              It might've started as a DosErr list in 89, but a computer with >50MB of ram would've been a godly system back then. OTOH given the history of these sort of things I wouldn't've been surprised if it also has a "not enough gigahertz error" as well.

              3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18

              R P B 3 Replies Last reply
              0
              • L Luc Pattyn

                WinErr FFF: call GetLastWinErrEx() to obtain additional error code. :)

                Luc Pattyn [Forum Guidelines] [Why QA sucks] [My Articles]


                Happy New Year to all.
                We hope 2010 soon brings us automatic PRE tags!
                Until then, please insert them manually.


                0 Offline
                0 Offline
                0x3c0
                wrote on last edited by
                #7

                WinErr FFF: -Error

                OSDev :)

                C 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • 0 0x3c0

                  WinErr FFF: -Error

                  OSDev :)

                  C Offline
                  C Offline
                  CPallini
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #8

                  WinErr 3C0: User's attempt to rool his own operative system. :)

                  If the Lord God Almighty had consulted me before embarking upon the Creation, I would have recommended something simpler. -- Alfonso the Wise, 13th Century King of Castile.
                  This is going on my arrogant assumptions. You may have a superb reason why I'm completely wrong. -- Iain Clarke
                  [My articles]

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • D Dan Neely

                    WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available.

                    It might've started as a DosErr list in 89, but a computer with >50MB of ram would've been a godly system back then. OTOH given the history of these sort of things I wouldn't've been surprised if it also has a "not enough gigahertz error" as well.

                    3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18

                    R Offline
                    R Offline
                    realJSOP
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #9

                    Back then, only 640k was usable - the rest was "extended".

                    .45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly
                    -----
                    "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
                    -----
                    "The staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - J. Jystad, 2001

                    P 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • D Dan Neely

                      WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available.

                      It might've started as a DosErr list in 89, but a computer with >50MB of ram would've been a godly system back then. OTOH given the history of these sort of things I wouldn't've been surprised if it also has a "not enough gigahertz error" as well.

                      3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18

                      P Offline
                      P Offline
                      peterchen
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #10

                      heh - I was triggered by the same. The age of the list does not match the amount of memory in any way. (Unless they mixed up memory and disk space)

                      Personally, I love the idea that Raymond spends his nights posting bad regexs to mailing lists under the pseudonym of Jane Smith. He'd be like a super hero, only more nerdy and less useful. [Trevel]
                      | FoldWithUs! | sighist | µLaunch - program launcher for server core and hyper-v server

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • R realJSOP

                        Back then, only 640k was usable - the rest was "extended".

                        .45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly
                        -----
                        "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
                        -----
                        "The staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - J. Jystad, 2001

                        P Offline
                        P Offline
                        peterchen
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #11

                        ... or "expanded".

                        Personally, I love the idea that Raymond spends his nights posting bad regexs to mailing lists under the pseudonym of Jane Smith. He'd be like a super hero, only more nerdy and less useful. [Trevel]
                        | FoldWithUs! | sighist | µLaunch - program launcher for server core and hyper-v server

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • L LloydA111

                          WinErr 001: Windows loaded - System in danger WinErr 002: No Error - Yet WinErr 003: Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file WinErr 004: Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive WinErr 007: System price error - Inadequate money spent on hardware WinErr 008: Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments WinErr 009: Horrible bug encountered - God knows what happened WinErr 00A: Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full WinErr 00B: Inadequate disk space - Free at least 50MB WinErr 00C: Memory hog error - More Ram needed. More! More! WinErr 00D: Window closed - Do not look outside WinErr 00E: Window open - Do not look inside WinErr 00F: Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened WinErr 010: Reserved for future mistakes by our developers WinErr 011: Window open - Do not look outside WinErr 012: Window closed - Do not look inside WinErr 013: Unexpected error - Huh ? WinErr 014: Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of. WinErr 018: Unrecoverable error - System destroyed. Buy new one. WinErr 019: User error - Not our fault. Is Not! Is Not! WinErr 01A: OS overwritten - Please reinstall all software. WinErr 01B: Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error. Next time you will suffer a penalty for that. WinErr 01C: Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate. WinErr 01D: System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code. WinErr 01E: Timing error - Please wait. And wait. And wait. And wait. WinErr 01F: Reserved for future mistakes of our developers. WinErr 020: Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be lost. WinErr 042: Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box. The virus, however, requires Windows. All tasks will automatically be closed and the virus will be activated again. WinErr 079: Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed. Please click the left mouse button to continue. WinErr 103: Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered. Additional errors may not be displayed or recorded. WinErr 678: This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? WinErr 683: Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the system to complete boot procedure. WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available. WinErr 912: Purchase a new copy of Windows today. Old license void. Windows has been deleted.

                          R Offline
                          R Offline
                          Rajesh R Subramanian
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #12

                          On an unrelated note, your signature area (the yellow, red and black combo) looks HORRIBLE.

                          “Follow your bliss.” – Joseph Campbell

                          L 1 Reply Last reply
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                          • R Rajesh R Subramanian

                            On an unrelated note, your signature area (the yellow, red and black combo) looks HORRIBLE.

                            “Follow your bliss.” – Joseph Campbell

                            L Offline
                            L Offline
                            LloydA111
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #13

                            Look better? :)

                            I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                            My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                            L R 2 Replies Last reply
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                            • D Dan Neely

                              WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available.

                              It might've started as a DosErr list in 89, but a computer with >50MB of ram would've been a godly system back then. OTOH given the history of these sort of things I wouldn't've been surprised if it also has a "not enough gigahertz error" as well.

                              3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18

                              B Offline
                              B Offline
                              B rad A
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #14

                              I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive :laugh: and a DVD player!! :-D

                              Q S 2 Replies Last reply
                              0
                              • B B rad A

                                I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive :laugh: and a DVD player!! :-D

                                Q Offline
                                Q Offline
                                QuiJohn
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #15

                                B-rad A wrote:

                                I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive and a DVD player!!

                                I once paid $250 for an 80MB drive (note the M) and couldn't believe what a great deal I had found. That's 80 MILLION bytes!! Of course the biggest program I had at the time was King's Quest V weighing in at 10MB or so.


                                He said, "Boy I'm just old and lonely, But thank you for your concern, Here's wishing you a Happy New Year." I wished him one back in return.

                                B R 2 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • B B rad A

                                  I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive :laugh: and a DVD player!! :-D

                                  S Offline
                                  S Offline
                                  Single Step Debugger
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #16

                                  B-rad A wrote:

                                  I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive and a DVD player!!

                                  This was my first “real” computer; also including 133 MHz Pentium and 4 Mb of video memory, later upgraded to 16 Mb Voodo 3Dfx because the Quake II emerged! :-D

                                  The narrow specialist in the broad sense of the word is a complete idiot in the narrow sense of the word. Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • Q QuiJohn

                                    B-rad A wrote:

                                    I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive and a DVD player!!

                                    I once paid $250 for an 80MB drive (note the M) and couldn't believe what a great deal I had found. That's 80 MILLION bytes!! Of course the biggest program I had at the time was King's Quest V weighing in at 10MB or so.


                                    He said, "Boy I'm just old and lonely, But thank you for your concern, Here's wishing you a Happy New Year." I wished him one back in return.

                                    B Offline
                                    B Offline
                                    B rad A
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #17

                                    I can believe it, the whole package for my computer was around $2,000 and it was refurbished, but did also come with a 17 inch monitor

                                    S 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • B B rad A

                                      I can believe it, the whole package for my computer was around $2,000 and it was refurbished, but did also come with a 17 inch monitor

                                      S Offline
                                      S Offline
                                      Single Step Debugger
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #18

                                      Mine/see my previous response/ came with 14’’ monitor but it was bright new and for about $1200.

                                      The narrow specialist in the broad sense of the word is a complete idiot in the narrow sense of the word. Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • L LloydA111

                                        Look better? :)

                                        I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                                        My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                                        L Offline
                                        L Offline
                                        Lost User
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #19

                                        Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

                                        Look better?

                                        Only marginally - kill the border all together.

                                        L 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • L Lost User

                                          Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

                                          Look better?

                                          Only marginally - kill the border all together.

                                          L Offline
                                          L Offline
                                          LloydA111
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #20

                                          Better?

                                          I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                                          My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                                          L L 2 Replies Last reply
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