Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Tags
  • Popular
  • World
  • Users
  • Groups
Skins
  • Light
  • Cerulean
  • Cosmo
  • Flatly
  • Journal
  • Litera
  • Lumen
  • Lux
  • Materia
  • Minty
  • Morph
  • Pulse
  • Sandstone
  • Simplex
  • Sketchy
  • Spacelab
  • United
  • Yeti
  • Zephyr
  • Dark
  • Cyborg
  • Darkly
  • Quartz
  • Slate
  • Solar
  • Superhero
  • Vapor

  • Default (No Skin)
  • No Skin
Collapse
Code Project
  1. Home
  2. The Lounge
  3. Windows jokes

Windows jokes

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
helpgame-devhardwareperformancequestion
35 Posts 18 Posters 0 Views 1 Watching
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • L Luc Pattyn

    WinErr FFF: call GetLastWinErrEx() to obtain additional error code. :)

    Luc Pattyn [Forum Guidelines] [Why QA sucks] [My Articles]


    Happy New Year to all.
    We hope 2010 soon brings us automatic PRE tags!
    Until then, please insert them manually.


    0 Offline
    0 Offline
    0x3c0
    wrote on last edited by
    #7

    WinErr FFF: -Error

    OSDev :)

    C 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • 0 0x3c0

      WinErr FFF: -Error

      OSDev :)

      C Offline
      C Offline
      CPallini
      wrote on last edited by
      #8

      WinErr 3C0: User's attempt to rool his own operative system. :)

      If the Lord God Almighty had consulted me before embarking upon the Creation, I would have recommended something simpler. -- Alfonso the Wise, 13th Century King of Castile.
      This is going on my arrogant assumptions. You may have a superb reason why I'm completely wrong. -- Iain Clarke
      [My articles]

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • D Dan Neely

        WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available.

        It might've started as a DosErr list in 89, but a computer with >50MB of ram would've been a godly system back then. OTOH given the history of these sort of things I wouldn't've been surprised if it also has a "not enough gigahertz error" as well.

        3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18

        P Offline
        P Offline
        peterchen
        wrote on last edited by
        #9

        heh - I was triggered by the same. The age of the list does not match the amount of memory in any way. (Unless they mixed up memory and disk space)

        Personally, I love the idea that Raymond spends his nights posting bad regexs to mailing lists under the pseudonym of Jane Smith. He'd be like a super hero, only more nerdy and less useful. [Trevel]
        | FoldWithUs! | sighist | µLaunch - program launcher for server core and hyper-v server

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • D Dan Neely

          WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available.

          It might've started as a DosErr list in 89, but a computer with >50MB of ram would've been a godly system back then. OTOH given the history of these sort of things I wouldn't've been surprised if it also has a "not enough gigahertz error" as well.

          3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18

          R Offline
          R Offline
          realJSOP
          wrote on last edited by
          #10

          Back then, only 640k was usable - the rest was "extended".

          .45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly
          -----
          "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
          -----
          "The staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - J. Jystad, 2001

          P 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • R realJSOP

            Back then, only 640k was usable - the rest was "extended".

            .45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly
            -----
            "Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass..." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
            -----
            "The staggering layers of obscenity in your statement make it a work of art on so many levels." - J. Jystad, 2001

            P Offline
            P Offline
            peterchen
            wrote on last edited by
            #11

            ... or "expanded".

            Personally, I love the idea that Raymond spends his nights posting bad regexs to mailing lists under the pseudonym of Jane Smith. He'd be like a super hero, only more nerdy and less useful. [Trevel]
            | FoldWithUs! | sighist | µLaunch - program launcher for server core and hyper-v server

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • L LloydA111

              WinErr 001: Windows loaded - System in danger WinErr 002: No Error - Yet WinErr 003: Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file WinErr 004: Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive WinErr 007: System price error - Inadequate money spent on hardware WinErr 008: Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments WinErr 009: Horrible bug encountered - God knows what happened WinErr 00A: Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full WinErr 00B: Inadequate disk space - Free at least 50MB WinErr 00C: Memory hog error - More Ram needed. More! More! WinErr 00D: Window closed - Do not look outside WinErr 00E: Window open - Do not look inside WinErr 00F: Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened WinErr 010: Reserved for future mistakes by our developers WinErr 011: Window open - Do not look outside WinErr 012: Window closed - Do not look inside WinErr 013: Unexpected error - Huh ? WinErr 014: Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of. WinErr 018: Unrecoverable error - System destroyed. Buy new one. WinErr 019: User error - Not our fault. Is Not! Is Not! WinErr 01A: OS overwritten - Please reinstall all software. WinErr 01B: Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error. Next time you will suffer a penalty for that. WinErr 01C: Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate. WinErr 01D: System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code. WinErr 01E: Timing error - Please wait. And wait. And wait. And wait. WinErr 01F: Reserved for future mistakes of our developers. WinErr 020: Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be lost. WinErr 042: Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box. The virus, however, requires Windows. All tasks will automatically be closed and the virus will be activated again. WinErr 079: Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed. Please click the left mouse button to continue. WinErr 103: Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered. Additional errors may not be displayed or recorded. WinErr 678: This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? WinErr 683: Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the system to complete boot procedure. WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available. WinErr 912: Purchase a new copy of Windows today. Old license void. Windows has been deleted.

              R Offline
              R Offline
              Rajesh R Subramanian
              wrote on last edited by
              #12

              On an unrelated note, your signature area (the yellow, red and black combo) looks HORRIBLE.

              “Follow your bliss.” – Joseph Campbell

              L 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • R Rajesh R Subramanian

                On an unrelated note, your signature area (the yellow, red and black combo) looks HORRIBLE.

                “Follow your bliss.” – Joseph Campbell

                L Offline
                L Offline
                LloydA111
                wrote on last edited by
                #13

                Look better? :)

                I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                L R 2 Replies Last reply
                0
                • D Dan Neely

                  WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available.

                  It might've started as a DosErr list in 89, but a computer with >50MB of ram would've been a godly system back then. OTOH given the history of these sort of things I wouldn't've been surprised if it also has a "not enough gigahertz error" as well.

                  3x12=36 2x12=24 1x12=12 0x12=18

                  B Offline
                  B Offline
                  B rad A
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #14

                  I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive :laugh: and a DVD player!! :-D

                  Q S 2 Replies Last reply
                  0
                  • B B rad A

                    I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive :laugh: and a DVD player!! :-D

                    Q Offline
                    Q Offline
                    QuiJohn
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #15

                    B-rad A wrote:

                    I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive and a DVD player!!

                    I once paid $250 for an 80MB drive (note the M) and couldn't believe what a great deal I had found. That's 80 MILLION bytes!! Of course the biggest program I had at the time was King's Quest V weighing in at 10MB or so.


                    He said, "Boy I'm just old and lonely, But thank you for your concern, Here's wishing you a Happy New Year." I wished him one back in return.

                    B R 2 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • B B rad A

                      I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive :laugh: and a DVD player!! :-D

                      S Offline
                      S Offline
                      Single Step Debugger
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #16

                      B-rad A wrote:

                      I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive and a DVD player!!

                      This was my first “real” computer; also including 133 MHz Pentium and 4 Mb of video memory, later upgraded to 16 Mb Voodo 3Dfx because the Quake II emerged! :-D

                      The narrow specialist in the broad sense of the word is a complete idiot in the narrow sense of the word. Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • Q QuiJohn

                        B-rad A wrote:

                        I still have my box from 1998 and I believe it has 64MB of ram, an 8gig hard drive and a DVD player!!

                        I once paid $250 for an 80MB drive (note the M) and couldn't believe what a great deal I had found. That's 80 MILLION bytes!! Of course the biggest program I had at the time was King's Quest V weighing in at 10MB or so.


                        He said, "Boy I'm just old and lonely, But thank you for your concern, Here's wishing you a Happy New Year." I wished him one back in return.

                        B Offline
                        B Offline
                        B rad A
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #17

                        I can believe it, the whole package for my computer was around $2,000 and it was refurbished, but did also come with a 17 inch monitor

                        S 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • B B rad A

                          I can believe it, the whole package for my computer was around $2,000 and it was refurbished, but did also come with a 17 inch monitor

                          S Offline
                          S Offline
                          Single Step Debugger
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #18

                          Mine/see my previous response/ came with 14’’ monitor but it was bright new and for about $1200.

                          The narrow specialist in the broad sense of the word is a complete idiot in the narrow sense of the word. Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • L LloydA111

                            Look better? :)

                            I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                            My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                            L Offline
                            L Offline
                            Lost User
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #19

                            Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

                            Look better?

                            Only marginally - kill the border all together.

                            L 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • L Lost User

                              Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

                              Look better?

                              Only marginally - kill the border all together.

                              L Offline
                              L Offline
                              LloydA111
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #20

                              Better?

                              I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                              My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                              L L 2 Replies Last reply
                              0
                              • L LloydA111

                                Better?

                                I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                                My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                                L Offline
                                L Offline
                                Lost User
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #21

                                Perfect!

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • L LloydA111

                                  Better?

                                  I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                                  My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                                  L Offline
                                  L Offline
                                  Luc Pattyn
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #22

                                  Nah. That is boring. All that needed fixing was the color scheme. :)

                                  Luc Pattyn [Forum Guidelines] [Why QA sucks] [My Articles]


                                  Happy New Year to all.
                                  We hope 2010 soon brings us automatic PRE tags!
                                  Until then, please insert them manually.


                                  L 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • L LloydA111

                                    WinErr 001: Windows loaded - System in danger WinErr 002: No Error - Yet WinErr 003: Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file WinErr 004: Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive WinErr 007: System price error - Inadequate money spent on hardware WinErr 008: Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments WinErr 009: Horrible bug encountered - God knows what happened WinErr 00A: Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full WinErr 00B: Inadequate disk space - Free at least 50MB WinErr 00C: Memory hog error - More Ram needed. More! More! WinErr 00D: Window closed - Do not look outside WinErr 00E: Window open - Do not look inside WinErr 00F: Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened WinErr 010: Reserved for future mistakes by our developers WinErr 011: Window open - Do not look outside WinErr 012: Window closed - Do not look inside WinErr 013: Unexpected error - Huh ? WinErr 014: Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of. WinErr 018: Unrecoverable error - System destroyed. Buy new one. WinErr 019: User error - Not our fault. Is Not! Is Not! WinErr 01A: OS overwritten - Please reinstall all software. WinErr 01B: Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error. Next time you will suffer a penalty for that. WinErr 01C: Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate. WinErr 01D: System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code. WinErr 01E: Timing error - Please wait. And wait. And wait. And wait. WinErr 01F: Reserved for future mistakes of our developers. WinErr 020: Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be lost. WinErr 042: Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box. The virus, however, requires Windows. All tasks will automatically be closed and the virus will be activated again. WinErr 079: Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed. Please click the left mouse button to continue. WinErr 103: Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered. Additional errors may not be displayed or recorded. WinErr 678: This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? WinErr 683: Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the system to complete boot procedure. WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available. WinErr 912: Purchase a new copy of Windows today. Old license void. Windows has been deleted.

                                    L Offline
                                    L Offline
                                    Lost User
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #23

                                    Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

                                    WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused

                                    Come on, you were waiting ;P

                                    Join the cool kids - Come fold with us[^]

                                    L 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • L Luc Pattyn

                                      Nah. That is boring. All that needed fixing was the color scheme. :)

                                      Luc Pattyn [Forum Guidelines] [Why QA sucks] [My Articles]


                                      Happy New Year to all.
                                      We hope 2010 soon brings us automatic PRE tags!
                                      Until then, please insert them manually.


                                      L Offline
                                      L Offline
                                      LloydA111
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #24

                                      What about this? :)

                                      I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                                      My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                                      L T 2 Replies Last reply
                                      0
                                      • L Lost User

                                        Lloyd Atkinson©☺ wrote:

                                        WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused

                                        Come on, you were waiting ;P

                                        Join the cool kids - Come fold with us[^]

                                        L Offline
                                        L Offline
                                        LloydA111
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #25

                                        Haha ;P

                                        I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                                        My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • L LloydA111

                                          What about this? :)

                                          I know you believe you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard is not what I meant.

                                          My operating system kernel the first time it booted

                                          L Offline
                                          L Offline
                                          Luc Pattyn
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #26

                                          :thumbsup:

                                          Luc Pattyn [Forum Guidelines] [Why QA sucks] [My Articles]


                                          Happy New Year to all.
                                          We hope 2010 soon brings us automatic PRE tags!
                                          Until then, please insert them manually.


                                          L 1 Reply Last reply
                                          0
                                          Reply
                                          • Reply as topic
                                          Log in to reply
                                          • Oldest to Newest
                                          • Newest to Oldest
                                          • Most Votes


                                          • Login

                                          • Don't have an account? Register

                                          • Login or register to search.
                                          • First post
                                            Last post
                                          0
                                          • Categories
                                          • Recent
                                          • Tags
                                          • Popular
                                          • World
                                          • Users
                                          • Groups