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  3. How to tell you've been married a long time.........

How to tell you've been married a long time.........

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  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

    My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

    Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
    www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

    J Offline
    J Offline
    Jim Crafton
    wrote on last edited by
    #2

    Bravo!

    ¡El diablo está en mis pantalones! ¡Mire, mire! SELECT * FROM User WHERE Clue > 0 0 rows returned Save an Orange - Use the VCF! Personal 3D projects Just Say No to Web 2 Point Blow

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

      My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

      Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
      www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

      C Offline
      C Offline
      Chris Meech
      wrote on last edited by
      #3

      Didn't you recently post about getting a fishing kit. :cool:

      Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]

      Mike HankeyM 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

        My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

        Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
        www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

        M Offline
        M Offline
        musefan
        wrote on last edited by
        #4

        This is a cut down version of the one I heard.. the other was better

        I may or may not be responsible for my own actions

        J 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

          My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

          Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
          www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

          J Offline
          J Offline
          Johnny J
          wrote on last edited by
          #5

          Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

          Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
          -----
          Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
          -----
          Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
          -----
          Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

          T J 2 Replies Last reply
          0
          • M musefan

            This is a cut down version of the one I heard.. the other was better

            I may or may not be responsible for my own actions

            J Offline
            J Offline
            Johnny J
            wrote on last edited by
            #6

            Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

            Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
            -----
            Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
            -----
            Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
            -----
            Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

            X 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • J Johnny J

              Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

              Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
              -----
              Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
              -----
              Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
              -----
              Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

              T Offline
              T Offline
              twohowlingdogs
              wrote on last edited by
              #7

              Be like us. We don't have any TV stations. Just haven't gotten cable and don't like the dishes on the roof. So we resort to Redbox and Netflix. But I may break down soon and pay for cable. :sigh:

              If you know what I mean...and I think you do...

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • C Chris Meech

                Didn't you recently post about getting a fishing kit. :cool:

                Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]

                Mike HankeyM Offline
                Mike HankeyM Offline
                Mike Hankey
                wrote on last edited by
                #8

                I did didn't I...busted. :)

                Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                  My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                  Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                  www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                  R Offline
                  R Offline
                  Rhuros
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #9

                  boom boom tish...

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                    My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                    Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                    www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                    T Offline
                    T Offline
                    Thats Aragon
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #10

                    Repost[^]

                    Regards :)

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • J Johnny J

                      Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

                      Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                      -----
                      Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                      -----
                      Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                      -----
                      Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                      X Offline
                      X Offline
                      Xiangyang Liu
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #11

                      Johnny J. wrote:

                      Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

                      Include pictures ...

                      My Younger Son & His "PET"

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                        My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                        Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                        www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                        S Offline
                        S Offline
                        Septimus Hedgehog
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #12

                        Some years ago, I was with my wife in a shop trying on some sunglasses. I put a pair on and asked her if they made me look dark and mysterious. "Yes," she replied, "like a swamp." :)

                        L 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • S Septimus Hedgehog

                          Some years ago, I was with my wife in a shop trying on some sunglasses. I put a pair on and asked her if they made me look dark and mysterious. "Yes," she replied, "like a swamp." :)

                          L Offline
                          L Offline
                          Lost User
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #13

                          A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                          Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                          J F 2 Replies Last reply
                          0
                          • L Lost User

                            A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                            Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                            J Offline
                            J Offline
                            Johnny J
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #14

                            No shite? :laugh: How long did it take you to regain mobility? :rolleyes:

                            Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                            -----
                            Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                            -----
                            Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                            -----
                            Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • L Lost User

                              A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                              Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                              F Offline
                              F Offline
                              fjdiewornncalwe
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #15

                              "Instant Vasectomy"

                              I wasn't, now I am, then I won't be anymore.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                                Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                N Offline
                                N Offline
                                Nagy Vilmos
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #16

                                ... You plan a nice early night on your wedding aniversary ... ... so you can sleep. Ten years ago today Beautiful Girlfriend become Darling Wife. :-D


                                Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often *students*, for heaven's sake. -- (Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett)

                                Mike HankeyM 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • J Johnny J

                                  Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

                                  Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                                  -----
                                  Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                                  -----
                                  Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                                  -----
                                  Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                                  J Offline
                                  J Offline
                                  jeron1
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #17

                                  Johnny J. wrote:

                                  the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand

                                  Our wives must be related! :laugh:

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                    My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                                    Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                    www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                    R Offline
                                    R Offline
                                    Rick Shaub
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #18

                                    You should have replied that you're used to thinking about fishing to make it last longer.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • N Nagy Vilmos

                                      ... You plan a nice early night on your wedding aniversary ... ... so you can sleep. Ten years ago today Beautiful Girlfriend become Darling Wife. :-D


                                      Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often *students*, for heaven's sake. -- (Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett)

                                      Mike HankeyM Offline
                                      Mike HankeyM Offline
                                      Mike Hankey
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #19

                                      Happy anniversary...a good woman is hard to find.

                                      Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                      www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                        My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                                        Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                        www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                        S Offline
                                        S Offline
                                        Slacker007
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #20

                                        32 5 votes. Way to go.

                                        -- You don't hire a handyman to build a house, you hire a specialist.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
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