How to tell you've been married a long time.........
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This is a cut down version of the one I heard.. the other was better
I may or may not be responsible for my own actions
Post it for comparative scrutinizing...
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
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Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
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Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
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Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932 -
Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
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Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
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Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
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Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932Be like us. We don't have any TV stations. Just haven't gotten cable and don't like the dishes on the roof. So we resort to Redbox and Netflix. But I may break down soon and pay for cable. :sigh:
If you know what I mean...and I think you do...
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Didn't you recently post about getting a fishing kit. :cool:
Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]
I did didn't I...busted. :)
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
Post it for comparative scrutinizing...
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
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Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
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Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
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Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932Johnny J. wrote:
Post it for comparative scrutinizing...
Include pictures ...
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My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeistSome years ago, I was with my wife in a shop trying on some sunglasses. I put a pair on and asked her if they made me look dark and mysterious. "Yes," she replied, "like a swamp." :)
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Some years ago, I was with my wife in a shop trying on some sunglasses. I put a pair on and asked her if they made me look dark and mysterious. "Yes," she replied, "like a swamp." :)
A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.
Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.
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A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.
Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.
No shite? :laugh: How long did it take you to regain mobility? :rolleyes:
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
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Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
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Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
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Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932 -
A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.
Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.
"Instant Vasectomy"
I wasn't, now I am, then I won't be anymore.
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My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist... You plan a nice early night on your wedding aniversary ... ... so you can sleep. Ten years ago today Beautiful Girlfriend become Darling Wife. :-D
Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often *students*, for heaven's sake. -- (Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett)
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Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.
Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
-----
Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
-----
Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
-----
Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932 -
My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeistYou should have replied that you're used to thinking about fishing to make it last longer.
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... You plan a nice early night on your wedding aniversary ... ... so you can sleep. Ten years ago today Beautiful Girlfriend become Darling Wife. :-D
Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often *students*, for heaven's sake. -- (Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett)
Happy anniversary...a good woman is hard to find.
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist -
My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".
Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist32 5 votes. Way to go.
-- You don't hire a handyman to build a house, you hire a specialist.
