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  3. How to tell you've been married a long time.........

How to tell you've been married a long time.........

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

    My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

    Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
    www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

    C Offline
    C Offline
    Chris Meech
    wrote on last edited by
    #3

    Didn't you recently post about getting a fishing kit. :cool:

    Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]

    Mike HankeyM 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

      My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

      Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
      www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

      M Offline
      M Offline
      musefan
      wrote on last edited by
      #4

      This is a cut down version of the one I heard.. the other was better

      I may or may not be responsible for my own actions

      J 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

        My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

        Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
        www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

        J Offline
        J Offline
        Johnny J
        wrote on last edited by
        #5

        Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

        Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
        -----
        Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
        -----
        Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
        -----
        Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

        T J 2 Replies Last reply
        0
        • M musefan

          This is a cut down version of the one I heard.. the other was better

          I may or may not be responsible for my own actions

          J Offline
          J Offline
          Johnny J
          wrote on last edited by
          #6

          Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

          Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
          -----
          Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
          -----
          Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
          -----
          Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

          X 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • J Johnny J

            Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

            Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
            -----
            Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
            -----
            Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
            -----
            Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

            T Offline
            T Offline
            twohowlingdogs
            wrote on last edited by
            #7

            Be like us. We don't have any TV stations. Just haven't gotten cable and don't like the dishes on the roof. So we resort to Redbox and Netflix. But I may break down soon and pay for cable. :sigh:

            If you know what I mean...and I think you do...

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • C Chris Meech

              Didn't you recently post about getting a fishing kit. :cool:

              Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]

              Mike HankeyM Offline
              Mike HankeyM Offline
              Mike Hankey
              wrote on last edited by
              #8

              I did didn't I...busted. :)

              Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
              www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                R Offline
                R Offline
                Rhuros
                wrote on last edited by
                #9

                boom boom tish...

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                  My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                  Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                  www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                  T Offline
                  T Offline
                  Thats Aragon
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #10

                  Repost[^]

                  Regards :)

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • J Johnny J

                    Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

                    Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                    -----
                    Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                    -----
                    Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                    -----
                    Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                    X Offline
                    X Offline
                    Xiangyang Liu
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #11

                    Johnny J. wrote:

                    Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

                    Include pictures ...

                    My Younger Son & His "PET"

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                      My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                      Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                      www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                      S Offline
                      S Offline
                      Septimus Hedgehog
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #12

                      Some years ago, I was with my wife in a shop trying on some sunglasses. I put a pair on and asked her if they made me look dark and mysterious. "Yes," she replied, "like a swamp." :)

                      L 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • S Septimus Hedgehog

                        Some years ago, I was with my wife in a shop trying on some sunglasses. I put a pair on and asked her if they made me look dark and mysterious. "Yes," she replied, "like a swamp." :)

                        L Offline
                        L Offline
                        Lost User
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #13

                        A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                        Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                        J F 2 Replies Last reply
                        0
                        • L Lost User

                          A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                          Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                          J Offline
                          J Offline
                          Johnny J
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #14

                          No shite? :laugh: How long did it take you to regain mobility? :rolleyes:

                          Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                          -----
                          Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                          -----
                          Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                          -----
                          Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • L Lost User

                            A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                            Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                            F Offline
                            F Offline
                            fjdiewornncalwe
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #15

                            "Instant Vasectomy"

                            I wasn't, now I am, then I won't be anymore.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                              My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                              Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                              www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                              N Offline
                              N Offline
                              Nagy Vilmos
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #16

                              ... You plan a nice early night on your wedding aniversary ... ... so you can sleep. Ten years ago today Beautiful Girlfriend become Darling Wife. :-D


                              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often *students*, for heaven's sake. -- (Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett)

                              Mike HankeyM 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • J Johnny J

                                Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

                                Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                                -----
                                Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                                -----
                                Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                                -----
                                Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                                J Offline
                                J Offline
                                jeron1
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #17

                                Johnny J. wrote:

                                the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand

                                Our wives must be related! :laugh:

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                  My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                                  Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                  www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                  R Offline
                                  R Offline
                                  Rick Shaub
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #18

                                  You should have replied that you're used to thinking about fishing to make it last longer.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • N Nagy Vilmos

                                    ... You plan a nice early night on your wedding aniversary ... ... so you can sleep. Ten years ago today Beautiful Girlfriend become Darling Wife. :-D


                                    Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often *students*, for heaven's sake. -- (Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett)

                                    Mike HankeyM Offline
                                    Mike HankeyM Offline
                                    Mike Hankey
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #19

                                    Happy anniversary...a good woman is hard to find.

                                    Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                    www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                      My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                                      Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                      www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                      S Offline
                                      S Offline
                                      Slacker007
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #20

                                      32 5 votes. Way to go.

                                      -- You don't hire a handyman to build a house, you hire a specialist.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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