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  3. How to tell you've been married a long time.........

How to tell you've been married a long time.........

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  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

    My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

    Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
    www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

    M Offline
    M Offline
    musefan
    wrote on last edited by
    #4

    This is a cut down version of the one I heard.. the other was better

    I may or may not be responsible for my own actions

    J 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

      My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

      Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
      www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

      J Offline
      J Offline
      Johnny J
      wrote on last edited by
      #5

      Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

      Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
      -----
      Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
      -----
      Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
      -----
      Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

      T J 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • M musefan

        This is a cut down version of the one I heard.. the other was better

        I may or may not be responsible for my own actions

        J Offline
        J Offline
        Johnny J
        wrote on last edited by
        #6

        Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

        Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
        -----
        Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
        -----
        Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
        -----
        Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

        X 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • J Johnny J

          Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

          Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
          -----
          Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
          -----
          Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
          -----
          Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

          T Offline
          T Offline
          twohowlingdogs
          wrote on last edited by
          #7

          Be like us. We don't have any TV stations. Just haven't gotten cable and don't like the dishes on the roof. So we resort to Redbox and Netflix. But I may break down soon and pay for cable. :sigh:

          If you know what I mean...and I think you do...

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • C Chris Meech

            Didn't you recently post about getting a fishing kit. :cool:

            Chris Meech I am Canadian. [heard in a local bar] In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. [Yogi Berra] posting about Crystal Reports here is like discussing gay marriage on a catholic church’s website.[Nishant Sivakumar]

            Mike HankeyM Offline
            Mike HankeyM Offline
            Mike Hankey
            wrote on last edited by
            #8

            I did didn't I...busted. :)

            Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
            www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

              My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

              Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
              www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

              R Offline
              R Offline
              Rhuros
              wrote on last edited by
              #9

              boom boom tish...

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                T Offline
                T Offline
                Thats Aragon
                wrote on last edited by
                #10

                Repost[^]

                Regards :)

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • J Johnny J

                  Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

                  Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                  -----
                  Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                  -----
                  Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                  -----
                  Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                  X Offline
                  X Offline
                  Xiangyang Liu
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #11

                  Johnny J. wrote:

                  Post it for comparative scrutinizing...

                  Include pictures ...

                  My Younger Son & His "PET"

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                    My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                    Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                    www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                    S Offline
                    S Offline
                    Septimus Hedgehog
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #12

                    Some years ago, I was with my wife in a shop trying on some sunglasses. I put a pair on and asked her if they made me look dark and mysterious. "Yes," she replied, "like a swamp." :)

                    L 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • S Septimus Hedgehog

                      Some years ago, I was with my wife in a shop trying on some sunglasses. I put a pair on and asked her if they made me look dark and mysterious. "Yes," she replied, "like a swamp." :)

                      L Offline
                      L Offline
                      Lost User
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #13

                      A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                      Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                      J F 2 Replies Last reply
                      0
                      • L Lost User

                        A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                        Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                        J Offline
                        J Offline
                        Johnny J
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #14

                        No shite? :laugh: How long did it take you to regain mobility? :rolleyes:

                        Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                        -----
                        Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                        -----
                        Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                        -----
                        Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • L Lost User

                          A number of years ago I was in the supermarket with my wife when she spotted a large tub of biscuits on special offer. You don't need those I said. Why not she asked. Cos you're too f*&%ing fat already I replied. Turns out that was a bad move.

                          Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                          F Offline
                          F Offline
                          fjdiewornncalwe
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #15

                          "Instant Vasectomy"

                          I wasn't, now I am, then I won't be anymore.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                            My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                            Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                            www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                            N Offline
                            N Offline
                            Nagy Vilmos
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #16

                            ... You plan a nice early night on your wedding aniversary ... ... so you can sleep. Ten years ago today Beautiful Girlfriend become Darling Wife. :-D


                            Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often *students*, for heaven's sake. -- (Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett)

                            Mike HankeyM 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • J Johnny J

                              Couldn't happen in my house - the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand. And she's got the fastest hand in the west. The channels are flipping by so fast that I can't even register what's playing. But it doesn't matter because there's never anything good on anyway. I just wish she would leave the remote alone and let me put on a video instead of the tv crap.

                              Why can't I be applicable like John? - Me, April 2011
                              -----
                              Beidh ceol, caint agus craic againn - Seán Bán Breathnach
                              -----
                              Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo!
                              -----
                              Just because a thing is new don’t mean that it’s better - Will Rogers, September 4, 1932

                              J Offline
                              J Offline
                              jeron1
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #17

                              Johnny J. wrote:

                              the remote control seems to be surgically attached to my wife's hand

                              Our wives must be related! :laugh:

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                                Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                R Offline
                                R Offline
                                Rick Shaub
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #18

                                You should have replied that you're used to thinking about fishing to make it last longer.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • N Nagy Vilmos

                                  ... You plan a nice early night on your wedding aniversary ... ... so you can sleep. Ten years ago today Beautiful Girlfriend become Darling Wife. :-D


                                  Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H OK, I will win to day or my name isn't Ethel Crudacre! - DD Ethel Crudacre Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often *students*, for heaven's sake. -- (Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett)

                                  Mike HankeyM Offline
                                  Mike HankeyM Offline
                                  Mike Hankey
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #19

                                  Happy anniversary...a good woman is hard to find.

                                  Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                  www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • Mike HankeyM Mike Hankey

                                    My wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: "For God's sakes, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish".

                                    Semper Fi http://www.hq4thmarinescomm.com[^]
                                    www.jaxcoder.com[^] WinHeist

                                    S Offline
                                    S Offline
                                    Slacker007
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #20

                                    32 5 votes. Way to go.

                                    -- You don't hire a handyman to build a house, you hire a specialist.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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