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World's Worst...

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  • W wizardzz

    Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

    K Offline
    K Offline
    Keith Barrow
    wrote on last edited by
    #15

    "Your Licensed Software is not designed or intended for use in the design, construction, operation or maintenance of any nuclear facility, please have a pleasant meltdown Click. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr"

    Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
    -Or-
    A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

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    • K Karl Sanford

      "It is company policy not to take action unless they submit the issue at least 3 times." [Also, woohoo!]

      Be The Noise

      C Offline
      C Offline
      Corporal Agarn
      wrote on last edited by
      #16

      We delete your email unless we have one from each of the last three days.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • W wizardzz

        Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

        P Offline
        P Offline
        Pete OHanlon
        wrote on last edited by
        #17

        Do we make that? Wow, it sounds great. I've gotta get one for the kids.

        *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

        "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

        CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

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        • W wizardzz

          Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

          P Offline
          P Offline
          Pete OHanlon
          wrote on last edited by
          #18

          Oh wow. You're the one who bought that. And to think, we just released it as a bet.

          *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

          "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

          CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • W wizardzz

            Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

            P Offline
            P Offline
            Pete OHanlon
            wrote on last edited by
            #19

            Would you like fries with that?

            *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

            "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

            CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • W wizardzz

              Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

              P Offline
              P Offline
              Pete OHanlon
              wrote on last edited by
              #20

              We can only fix it if you can tell me the number I'm thinking of.

              *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

              "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

              CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • W wizardzz

                Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                P Offline
                P Offline
                Pete OHanlon
                wrote on last edited by
                #21

                I'm sorry, but unless you can beat me in the challenge of doom, I'm not allowed to give you that information.

                *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • W wizardzz

                  Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                  P Offline
                  P Offline
                  Pete OHanlon
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #22

                  My puppy died when I set fire to it. Will you be my friend?

                  *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                  "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                  CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                  A 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • W wizardzz

                    Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                    A Offline
                    A Offline
                    Andrei Straut
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #23

                    (Inspired by one of Pete's above): We can only help you if you provide us with the following information: Name, Address, Credit Card Number, Credit Card Security Code, Bank Account and Credit Card PIN. [joke] Also, PO'H does seem to be full of ideas here, speaking from experience? [/joke]

                    Full-fledged Java/.NET lover, full-fledged PHP hater. Full-fledged Google/Microsoft lover, full-fledged Apple hater. Full-fledged Skype lover, full-fledged YM hater.

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                    • A Andrei Straut

                      (Inspired by one of Pete's above): We can only help you if you provide us with the following information: Name, Address, Credit Card Number, Credit Card Security Code, Bank Account and Credit Card PIN. [joke] Also, PO'H does seem to be full of ideas here, speaking from experience? [/joke]

                      Full-fledged Java/.NET lover, full-fledged PHP hater. Full-fledged Google/Microsoft lover, full-fledged Apple hater. Full-fledged Skype lover, full-fledged YM hater.

                      P Offline
                      P Offline
                      Pete OHanlon
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #24

                      Actually, this one's too easy - I've not posted several others that I could have let rip with.

                      *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                      "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                      CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • A Andrei Straut

                        (Inspired by one of Pete's above): We can only help you if you provide us with the following information: Name, Address, Credit Card Number, Credit Card Security Code, Bank Account and Credit Card PIN. [joke] Also, PO'H does seem to be full of ideas here, speaking from experience? [/joke]

                        Full-fledged Java/.NET lover, full-fledged PHP hater. Full-fledged Google/Microsoft lover, full-fledged Apple hater. Full-fledged Skype lover, full-fledged YM hater.

                        P Offline
                        P Offline
                        Pete OHanlon
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #25

                        Will you be my friend Andrei?

                        *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                        "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                        CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                        A 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • P Pete OHanlon

                          Will you be my friend Andrei?

                          *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                          "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                          CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                          A Offline
                          A Offline
                          Andrei Straut
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #26

                          Only if you provide me with the info stated above :)

                          Full-fledged Java/.NET lover, full-fledged PHP hater. Full-fledged Google/Microsoft lover, full-fledged Apple hater. Full-fledged Skype lover, full-fledged YM hater.

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                          0
                          • W wizardzz

                            Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                            R Offline
                            R Offline
                            Rage
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #27

                            * Insert more than famous classical music piece playing in loop *

                            ~RaGE();

                            I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

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                            • W wizardzz

                              Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                              S Offline
                              S Offline
                              S Houghtelin
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #28

                              < backgroundMusic > ♫♪♫♪ आपकी कॉल हमारे लिए महत्वपूर्ण है! ♫♪♫♪ < /backgroundMusic >

                              It was broke, so I fixed it.

                              R 1 Reply Last reply
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                              • W wizardzz

                                Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                                R Offline
                                R Offline
                                Rage
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #29

                                Your problem does not seem to be in my solution tree, and you tried to talk me into shortcutting the first 15 questions. I cannot help you, and I am not allowed to disturb my boss while he's playing poker with Richard of the marketing. You are screwed.

                                ~RaGE();

                                I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • S S Houghtelin

                                  < backgroundMusic > ♫♪♫♪ आपकी कॉल हमारे लिए महत्वपूर्ण है! ♫♪♫♪ < /backgroundMusic >

                                  It was broke, so I fixed it.

                                  R Offline
                                  R Offline
                                  Rage
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #30

                                  Sorry Mr Samsung, while your design is better, I have a copyright[^] on this one.

                                  ~RaGE();

                                  I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                                  S 1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • R Rage

                                    Sorry Mr Samsung, while your design is better, I have a copyright[^] on this one.

                                    ~RaGE();

                                    I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                                    S Offline
                                    S Offline
                                    S Houghtelin
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #31

                                    Mine has lyrics [^]:-D

                                    It was broke, so I fixed it.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • W wizardzz

                                      Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                                      P Offline
                                      P Offline
                                      Pete OHanlon
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #32

                                      Hello pretty lady. I know where you live. You like to make the bumpety-bump with me? I wash just for you.

                                      *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                                      "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                                      CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • W wizardzz

                                        Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                                        C Offline
                                        C Offline
                                        CARisk3
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #33

                                        Said by the IT guy after they replaced my hard drive for the 3rd time - IT guy: "You know what will fix this problem?" Me: "No?" IT guy: "Don't touch the keyboard." I'm not kidding I was really told this.

                                        If you can’t have fun at work, then why go to work?

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • W wizardzz

                                          Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                                          D Offline
                                          D Offline
                                          dbrenth
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #34

                                          Try CodeProject. Someone there will google it for you.

                                          Brent

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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