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World's Worst...

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • W wizardzz

    Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

    P Offline
    P Offline
    Pete OHanlon
    wrote on last edited by
    #10

    If you'll hold the line for just 1 second, I'm busy typing your problem in to Code Project. It's OK, I've told them it's Urgntz, so we should have an answer real soon now.

    *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

    "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

    CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

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    • W wizardzz

      Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

      K Offline
      K Offline
      Karl Sanford
      wrote on last edited by
      #11

      "It is company policy not to take action unless they submit the issue at least 3 times." [Also, woohoo!]

      Be The Noise

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      • W wizardzz

        Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

        P Offline
        P Offline
        Pete OHanlon
        wrote on last edited by
        #12

        It's Apple madam. We aren't trained for things going wrong.

        *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

        "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

        CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

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        • W wizardzz

          Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

          W Offline
          W Offline
          wizardzz
          wrote on last edited by
          #13

          "That's actually a feature."

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • W wizardzz

            Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

            S Offline
            S Offline
            S Houghtelin
            wrote on last edited by
            #14

            Please hold until the next available support person is available... Hello, this is Kerpal how may I h....click... Your battery is low, please place your phone on the charger stand now.

            It was broke, so I fixed it.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • W wizardzz

              Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

              K Offline
              K Offline
              Keith Barrow
              wrote on last edited by
              #15

              "Your Licensed Software is not designed or intended for use in the design, construction, operation or maintenance of any nuclear facility, please have a pleasant meltdown Click. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr"

              Sort of a cross between Lawrence of Arabia and Dilbert.[^]
              -Or-
              A Dead ringer for Kate Winslett[^]

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              • K Karl Sanford

                "It is company policy not to take action unless they submit the issue at least 3 times." [Also, woohoo!]

                Be The Noise

                C Offline
                C Offline
                Corporal Agarn
                wrote on last edited by
                #16

                We delete your email unless we have one from each of the last three days.

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • W wizardzz

                  Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                  P Offline
                  P Offline
                  Pete OHanlon
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #17

                  Do we make that? Wow, it sounds great. I've gotta get one for the kids.

                  *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                  "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                  CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • W wizardzz

                    Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                    P Offline
                    P Offline
                    Pete OHanlon
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #18

                    Oh wow. You're the one who bought that. And to think, we just released it as a bet.

                    *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                    "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                    CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • W wizardzz

                      Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                      P Offline
                      P Offline
                      Pete OHanlon
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #19

                      Would you like fries with that?

                      *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                      "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                      CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • W wizardzz

                        Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                        P Offline
                        P Offline
                        Pete OHanlon
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #20

                        We can only fix it if you can tell me the number I'm thinking of.

                        *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                        "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                        CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • W wizardzz

                          Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                          P Offline
                          P Offline
                          Pete OHanlon
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #21

                          I'm sorry, but unless you can beat me in the challenge of doom, I'm not allowed to give you that information.

                          *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                          "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                          CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • W wizardzz

                            Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                            P Offline
                            P Offline
                            Pete OHanlon
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #22

                            My puppy died when I set fire to it. Will you be my friend?

                            *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                            "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                            CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                            A 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • W wizardzz

                              Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                              A Offline
                              A Offline
                              Andrei Straut
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #23

                              (Inspired by one of Pete's above): We can only help you if you provide us with the following information: Name, Address, Credit Card Number, Credit Card Security Code, Bank Account and Credit Card PIN. [joke] Also, PO'H does seem to be full of ideas here, speaking from experience? [/joke]

                              Full-fledged Java/.NET lover, full-fledged PHP hater. Full-fledged Google/Microsoft lover, full-fledged Apple hater. Full-fledged Skype lover, full-fledged YM hater.

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                              • A Andrei Straut

                                (Inspired by one of Pete's above): We can only help you if you provide us with the following information: Name, Address, Credit Card Number, Credit Card Security Code, Bank Account and Credit Card PIN. [joke] Also, PO'H does seem to be full of ideas here, speaking from experience? [/joke]

                                Full-fledged Java/.NET lover, full-fledged PHP hater. Full-fledged Google/Microsoft lover, full-fledged Apple hater. Full-fledged Skype lover, full-fledged YM hater.

                                P Offline
                                P Offline
                                Pete OHanlon
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #24

                                Actually, this one's too easy - I've not posted several others that I could have let rip with.

                                *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                                "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                                CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

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                                • A Andrei Straut

                                  (Inspired by one of Pete's above): We can only help you if you provide us with the following information: Name, Address, Credit Card Number, Credit Card Security Code, Bank Account and Credit Card PIN. [joke] Also, PO'H does seem to be full of ideas here, speaking from experience? [/joke]

                                  Full-fledged Java/.NET lover, full-fledged PHP hater. Full-fledged Google/Microsoft lover, full-fledged Apple hater. Full-fledged Skype lover, full-fledged YM hater.

                                  P Offline
                                  P Offline
                                  Pete OHanlon
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #25

                                  Will you be my friend Andrei?

                                  *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                                  "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                                  CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                                  A 1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • P Pete OHanlon

                                    Will you be my friend Andrei?

                                    *pre-emptive celebratory nipple tassle jiggle* - Sean Ewington

                                    "Mind bleach! Send me mind bleach!" - Nagy Vilmos

                                    CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

                                    A Offline
                                    A Offline
                                    Andrei Straut
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #26

                                    Only if you provide me with the info stated above :)

                                    Full-fledged Java/.NET lover, full-fledged PHP hater. Full-fledged Google/Microsoft lover, full-fledged Apple hater. Full-fledged Skype lover, full-fledged YM hater.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • W wizardzz

                                      Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                                      R Offline
                                      R Offline
                                      Rage
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #27

                                      * Insert more than famous classical music piece playing in loop *

                                      ~RaGE();

                                      I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

                                      D 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • W wizardzz

                                        Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                                        S Offline
                                        S Offline
                                        S Houghtelin
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #28

                                        < backgroundMusic > ♫♪♫♪ आपकी कॉल हमारे लिए महत्वपूर्ण है! ♫♪♫♪ < /backgroundMusic >

                                        It was broke, so I fixed it.

                                        R 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • W wizardzz

                                          Tech Support. Go ahead now, go on it with your one liners. No copy and pasted old jokes allowed. [Karl Sanford with the win from yesterday's 185 [^]. You win a particle. It's right here... Shit, no. Where is it now? Well, will you take a rain check?]

                                          R Offline
                                          R Offline
                                          Rage
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #29

                                          Your problem does not seem to be in my solution tree, and you tried to talk me into shortcutting the first 15 questions. I cannot help you, and I am not allowed to disturb my boss while he's playing poker with Richard of the marketing. You are screwed.

                                          ~RaGE();

                                          I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus Do not feed the troll ! - Common proverb

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