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  3. Coming out of the closet

Coming out of the closet

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved The Lounge
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  • S soap brain

    wizardzz wrote:

    Did you recently come out in your life, too? Or is this just a CP outing?

    I've told a few people in real life. Nobody in my family, though.

    wizardzz wrote:

    Also, where is your italicized quote in your profile from?

    Existentialist Firefighter Delays 3 Deaths[^]

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    W Offline
    wizardzz
    wrote on last edited by
    #89

    Well, goodluck Ravel. I hope things go well with your family, if/when you decide to tell them. BTW, that Onion article is incredible. Wow, thanks for sharing it.

    "I have a theory that the truth is never told during the nine-to-five hours. " — Hunter S. Thompson My comedy.

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    • G Gary Wheeler

      'Congratulations!' somehow seems awkward, but it does convey my best wishes.

      Software Zen: delete this;

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      S Offline
      soap brain
      wrote on last edited by
      #90

      Gary Wheeler wrote:

      'Congratulations!' somehow seems awkward, but it does convey my best wishes.

      :) Well, thank you all the same.

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      • W wizardzz

        Well, goodluck Ravel. I hope things go well with your family, if/when you decide to tell them. BTW, that Onion article is incredible. Wow, thanks for sharing it.

        "I have a theory that the truth is never told during the nine-to-five hours. " — Hunter S. Thompson My comedy.

        S Offline
        S Offline
        soap brain
        wrote on last edited by
        #91

        wizardzz wrote:

        I hope things go well with your family, if/when you decide to tell them.

        Thanks. I already know that they'll be all right with it, and in some ways that removes the pressure to tell them...

        wizardzz wrote:

        BTW, that Onion article is incredible. Wow, thanks for sharing it.

        I know, right?! It's easily one of the best things I've ever read. :-D

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        • L Lost User

          Dalek Dave wrote:

          You told us all a while ago you were Bi

          Many moons ago...

          Dalek Dave wrote:

          you for being dim

          Oh my god! Dim! You cant be serious! :O

          Dalek Dave wrote:

          offensive

          Glad you noticed. :)

          Dalek Dave wrote:

          wrong

          Now you are taking the piss! :O

          Dalek Dave wrote:

          Being French, yes, that was a choice!

          I am actually English, though I prefer the French. :)

          ============================== Nothing to say.

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          soap brain
          wrote on last edited by
          #92

          Fat__Eric wrote:

          I am actually English, though I prefer the French.

          :wtf:

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          • S soap brain

            Gary Wheeler wrote:

            'Congratulations!' somehow seems awkward, but it does convey my best wishes.

            :) Well, thank you all the same.

            G Offline
            G Offline
            Gary Wheeler
            wrote on last edited by
            #93

            By 'awkward' I also meant 'inadequate'. I don't know the etiquette for coming out announcements ;).

            Software Zen: delete this;

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            • G Gary Wheeler

              By 'awkward' I also meant 'inadequate'. I don't know the etiquette for coming out announcements ;).

              Software Zen: delete this;

              L Offline
              L Offline
              Lost User
              wrote on last edited by
              #94

              Well I think as DD said some time ago, the most normal response is "Yeah we know", cos whilst the outee has been struggling with it for some time everyone else has just taken it for granted and got on with things.

              Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

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              • T TheGreatAndPowerfulOz

                OK. I feel it important to announce that I'm heterosexual. I'm a guy who loves women. Thank you for your support. Why should his being gay matter? To anyone. It's a private matter that is his business. He shouldn't be treated any differently than anyone else.

                If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
                You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun

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                S Offline
                soap brain
                wrote on last edited by
                #95

                ahmed zahmed wrote:

                Why should his being gay matter? To anyone. It's a private matter that is his business. He shouldn't be treated any differently than anyone else.

                Other people make it their business, and when you're in a despised minority whose rights are being actively undermined by prominent groups in society, I can see the utility in not surrendering and hiding away out of sight. Ideally, yes, it shouldn't matter. But it does.

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                • L Lost User

                  It is more comfortable to sit on with her tail?

                  Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                  L Offline
                  L Offline
                  LittleYellowBird
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #96

                  Ouch! :rolleyes:

                  Ali

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                  • S soap brain

                    Alison P wrote:

                    Great! Does that mean you can advise me on soft furnishings? ;)

                    Well, if you're in the market for bad advice, sure! ;P

                    Alison P wrote:

                    Sorry, you know I have to turn everything into a joke!

                    I love that quality in a person.

                    Alison P wrote:

                    ... except maybe the odd cushion question.

                    Orange! No, purple! With lace! :-D

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                    LittleYellowBird
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #97

                    Ravel H. Joyce wrote:

                    Orange!
                    No, purple!
                    With lace!

                    Hmmm .... I'll come back to you on that! ;) :-D

                    Ali

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                    • S soap brain

                      I'm gay. Not a hugely interesting revelation, I freely confess, so I shan't go on about it.

                      S Offline
                      S Offline
                      Single Step Debugger
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #98

                      IMHO everybody here are gay some why or another.

                      There is only one Ashley Judd and Salma Hayek is her prophet! Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

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                      • L Lost User

                        Ravel H. Joyce wrote:

                        I'm an atheist

                        But you share a middle initial with Jesus.

                        Ravel H. Joyce wrote:

                        Well, that remains to be seen

                        So we'll have to wait for the future to unravel?

                        Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

                        A Offline
                        A Offline
                        AspDotNetDev
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #99

                        No matter the outcome, there will be reason to rejoyce.

                        Martin Fowler wrote:

                        Any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers write code that humans can understand.

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                        • S soap brain

                          ahmed zahmed wrote:

                          Why should his being gay matter? To anyone. It's a private matter that is his business. He shouldn't be treated any differently than anyone else.

                          Other people make it their business, and when you're in a despised minority whose rights are being actively undermined by prominent groups in society, I can see the utility in not surrendering and hiding away out of sight. Ideally, yes, it shouldn't matter. But it does.

                          P Offline
                          P Offline
                          Pete OHanlon
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #100

                          Ravel H. Joyce wrote:

                          when you're in a despised minority whose rights are being actively undermined by prominent groups in society

                          What, developing on Windows?

                          Forgive your enemies - it messes with their heads

                          My blog | My articles | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier - my favourite utility

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                          • S soap brain

                            wizardzz wrote:

                            Did you recently come out in your life, too? Or is this just a CP outing?

                            I've told a few people in real life. Nobody in my family, though.

                            wizardzz wrote:

                            Also, where is your italicized quote in your profile from?

                            Existentialist Firefighter Delays 3 Deaths[^]

                            T Offline
                            T Offline
                            TheGreatAndPowerfulOz
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #101

                            Ravel H. Joyce wrote:

                            Existentialist Firefighter Delays 3 Deaths[^]

                            That's damned hilarious! I love this quote: "Either way, there will be anguish and sorrow at some unknown point." As well as the one in your profile. LMAO

                            If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
                            You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun

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                            • S soap brain

                              ahmed zahmed wrote:

                              You want a medal or something?

                              Well, that wasn't my aim, but I wouldn't say 'no'...

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                              TheGreatAndPowerfulOz
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #102

                              LOL. I didn't really think so. It saddens me though that you are made to feel the need to "announce" anything. It shouldn't be that way. One should be accepted and loved and cared about for who they are. I hope your life is happy as can be.

                              If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
                              You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • A AspDotNetDev

                                No matter the outcome, there will be reason to rejoyce.

                                Martin Fowler wrote:

                                Any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers write code that humans can understand.

                                T Offline
                                T Offline
                                TheGreatAndPowerfulOz
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #103

                                AspDotNetDev wrote:

                                rejoyce

                                Snort! :laugh: :laugh: 5!

                                If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
                                You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • I Ian Shlasko

                                  Congratulations. I never did figure out the proper way to respond to a revelation like that... Granted, I live in a very liberal area, so it's really a non-issue here.

                                  Proud to have finally moved to the A-Ark. Which one are you in?
                                  Author of the Guardians Saga (Sci-Fi/Fantasy novels)

                                  J Offline
                                  J Offline
                                  Jorgen Andersson
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #104

                                  Ian Shlasko wrote:

                                  I never did figure out the proper way to respond to a revelation like that

                                  Neither have I. But when my best friend came out of the closet, my response without any thought was: "I'm not going to stop making gay jokes just because of that", which in hindsight seems to have been the right answer. But you know what? I basically did stop telling them. They have to be really good to be worth telling nowadays. And gays knows all the jokes already.

                                  List of common misconceptions

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                                  • S soap brain

                                    I'm gay. Not a hugely interesting revelation, I freely confess, so I shan't go on about it.

                                    J Offline
                                    J Offline
                                    Jorgen Andersson
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #105

                                    I have a couple of friends that are gay, and their experience was that it's worse to tell people the closer they are. But keep in mind that the friends that doesn't accept it, aren't worth having as friends! Family is worse, but if they love you they will accept it. When my best friend finally scraped together enough guts to tell his family, his father told him: We've known for years son, I'm happy you have found yourself.

                                    List of common misconceptions

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                                    • S soap brain

                                      I'm gay. Not a hugely interesting revelation, I freely confess, so I shan't go on about it.

                                      C Offline
                                      C Offline
                                      CalvinHobbies
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #106

                                      with all respect bud, you are Ravel, gay or straight. that's all that matters. it's you for you. how's things where you are? :) (pours you some coffee).

                                      ///////////////// -I’m a DHCP server at a local restaurant. This chick came up and asked me for my address, and I told her she was out of my scope -Why do Java Programmers wear glasses? Because they don’t C#

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                                      • L Lost User

                                        ahmed zahmed wrote:

                                        Why should his being gay matter?

                                        It does.

                                        ahmed zahmed wrote:

                                        To anyone

                                        To the person concerned.

                                        ahmed zahmed wrote:

                                        It's a private matter that is his business. He should be treated any differently than anyone else.

                                        I agree, thats why he is coming out, so he can be treated fairly by himself.

                                        ============================== Nothing to say.

                                        C Offline
                                        C Offline
                                        CalvinHobbies
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #107

                                        Fat__Eric wrote:

                                        ahmed zahmed wrote:

                                        Why should his being gay matter?

                                        It does.

                                        ahmed zahmed wrote:

                                        To anyone

                                        To the person concerned.

                                        ahmed zahmed wrote:

                                        It's a private matter that is his business. He should be treated any differently
                                        than anyone else.

                                        I agree, thats why he is coming out, so he can be treated fairly by himself.

                                        I can't speak for anyone else except me and my "circle of friends" on this topic. "why does it matter", as he's still the Ravel we know. It's not like he turned into a incrediable hulk or said he was concervative right winger. we look at him for "him". For Ravel though it's a big deal as he can be open about it and feel like he doesn't need to "hide". and don't say hetros aren't open about theirs as I've seen "tail" waggings. and people do try to hide "themselves" as lets face it, the human race is a bunch idiots and chastise anything and everything that's different, so can make things hard. I congratulate Ravel in his openness and able to take his "breath" but also letting him know, he's still a good bud to chat with and I think him non the different.

                                        ///////////////// -I’m a DHCP server at a local restaurant. This chick came up and asked me for my address, and I told her she was out of my scope -Why do Java Programmers wear glasses? Because they don’t C#

                                        T 1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • S soap brain

                                          ahmed zahmed wrote:

                                          Why should his being gay matter? To anyone. It's a private matter that is his business. He shouldn't be treated any differently than anyone else.

                                          Other people make it their business, and when you're in a despised minority whose rights are being actively undermined by prominent groups in society, I can see the utility in not surrendering and hiding away out of sight. Ideally, yes, it shouldn't matter. But it does.

                                          J Offline
                                          J Offline
                                          jschell
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #108

                                          Ravel H. Joyce wrote:

                                          Other people make it their business, and when you're in a despised minority whose rights are being actively undermined by prominent groups in society

                                          ...in societies.

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