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JOTD

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  • M Mark_Wallace

    OriginalGriff wrote:

    A Visual Basic programmer...

    Anyone in particular?

    I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

    N Offline
    N Offline
    NormDroid
    wrote on last edited by
    #4

    Should be easy to isolate after all there can't be that many who use VB.

    All right, you guys, I got eight crates of Ipecac from Mort. All on my tab. Now, whoever goes the longest without puking gets the last piece of pie in the fridge.

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • M Mark_Wallace

      OriginalGriff wrote:

      A Visual Basic programmer...

      Anyone in particular?

      I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

      C Offline
      C Offline
      CPallini
      wrote on last edited by
      #5

      Well, we've John Simmons... :laugh:

      If the Lord God Almighty had consulted me before embarking upon the Creation, I would have recommended something simpler. -- Alfonso the Wise, 13th Century King of Castile.
      This is going on my arrogant assumptions. You may have a superb reason why I'm completely wrong. -- Iain Clarke
      [My articles]

      C 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

        A Visual Basic programmer happens across a frog in the road. The frog pipes up, "I'm really a beautiful princess and if you kiss me, I'll stay with you for a week". The programmer shrugs his shoulders and puts the frog in his pocket. A few minutes later, the frog says "OK, OK, if you kiss me, I'll give you great sex for a week". The programmer nods and puts the frog back in his pocket. A few minutes later, "Turn me back into a princess and I'll give you great sex for a whole year!". The programmer smiles and walks on. Finally, the frog says, "What's wrong with you? I've promised you great sex for a year from a beautiful princess and you won't even kiss a frog?" "I'm a Visual Basic programmer," he replies. "I don't have sex....but a talking frog is pretty neat."

        You should never use standby on an elephant. It always crashes when you lift the ears. - Mark Wallace C/C++ (I dont see a huge difference between them, and the 'benefits' of C++ are questionable, who needs inheritance when you have copy and paste) - fat_boy

        N Offline
        N Offline
        Nish Nishant
        wrote on last edited by
        #6

        A talking frog I can digest. But a Visual Basic programmer! What is this? Some kind of sick perverted joke? :mad:

        Regards, Nish


        Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
        My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

        I 1 Reply Last reply
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        • D Dalek Dave

          OLD OLD OLD!!! Older than Henry Minute!

          ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave

          N Offline
          N Offline
          Nish Nishant
          wrote on last edited by
          #7

          Dalek Dave wrote:

          Older than Henry Minute!

          :laugh:

          Regards, Nish


          Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
          My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • D Dalek Dave

            OLD OLD OLD!!! Older than Henry Minute!

            ------------------------------------ I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave

            OriginalGriffO Offline
            OriginalGriffO Offline
            OriginalGriff
            wrote on last edited by
            #8

            I know it's old - but the lounge was a bit "tumble-weed" this morning and I was bored!

            You should never use standby on an elephant. It always crashes when you lift the ears. - Mark Wallace C/C++ (I dont see a huge difference between them, and the 'benefits' of C++ are questionable, who needs inheritance when you have copy and paste) - fat_boy

            "I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
            "Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • OriginalGriffO OriginalGriff

              A Visual Basic programmer happens across a frog in the road. The frog pipes up, "I'm really a beautiful princess and if you kiss me, I'll stay with you for a week". The programmer shrugs his shoulders and puts the frog in his pocket. A few minutes later, the frog says "OK, OK, if you kiss me, I'll give you great sex for a week". The programmer nods and puts the frog back in his pocket. A few minutes later, "Turn me back into a princess and I'll give you great sex for a whole year!". The programmer smiles and walks on. Finally, the frog says, "What's wrong with you? I've promised you great sex for a year from a beautiful princess and you won't even kiss a frog?" "I'm a Visual Basic programmer," he replies. "I don't have sex....but a talking frog is pretty neat."

              You should never use standby on an elephant. It always crashes when you lift the ears. - Mark Wallace C/C++ (I dont see a huge difference between them, and the 'benefits' of C++ are questionable, who needs inheritance when you have copy and paste) - fat_boy

              N Offline
              N Offline
              Nagy Vilmos
              wrote on last edited by
              #9

              I... ...write... ...code... ...in... ...VB... ... :sigh:


              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

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              • N Nagy Vilmos

                I... ...write... ...code... ...in... ...VB... ... :sigh:


                Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                B Offline
                B Offline
                Bergholt Stuttley Johnson
                wrote on last edited by
                #10

                Nagy Vilmos wrote:

                Can you... ...write... ...code... ...in... ...VB... ? ...

                FTFY

                Smile and the world smiles withyou, laugh and they think you are a nutter

                N 1 Reply Last reply
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                • C CPallini

                  Well, we've John Simmons... :laugh:

                  If the Lord God Almighty had consulted me before embarking upon the Creation, I would have recommended something simpler. -- Alfonso the Wise, 13th Century King of Castile.
                  This is going on my arrogant assumptions. You may have a superb reason why I'm completely wrong. -- Iain Clarke
                  [My articles]

                  C Offline
                  C Offline
                  Corinna John
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #11

                  Well, maybe he uses VB and he is a programmer. But that doesn't mean he is a "VB programmer". ;)

                  This statement is false.

                  C M 2 Replies Last reply
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                  • C Corinna John

                    Well, maybe he uses VB and he is a programmer. But that doesn't mean he is a "VB programmer". ;)

                    This statement is false.

                    C Offline
                    C Offline
                    CPallini
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #12

                    Wait. I'm extracting the hidden info... :-D

                    If the Lord God Almighty had consulted me before embarking upon the Creation, I would have recommended something simpler. -- Alfonso the Wise, 13th Century King of Castile.
                    This is going on my arrogant assumptions. You may have a superb reason why I'm completely wrong. -- Iain Clarke
                    [My articles]

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • N Nagy Vilmos

                      I... ...write... ...code... ...in... ...VB... ... :sigh:


                      Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                      R Offline
                      R Offline
                      Rage
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #13

                      Really ? Really really really ? How could someone like you fall in that trap ?

                      N 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • B Bergholt Stuttley Johnson

                        Nagy Vilmos wrote:

                        Can you... ...write... ...code... ...in... ...VB... ? ...

                        FTFY

                        Smile and the world smiles withyou, laugh and they think you are a nutter

                        N Offline
                        N Offline
                        Nagy Vilmos
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #14

                        Designed and implimented a retail banking system in VB a few years back currently work on a trading platform with a lot of VB front end components. So yes, I can write VB, but I prefer Java or C# poking an eye out with a shitty stick [ftfms].


                        Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                        R I 2 Replies Last reply
                        0
                        • R Rage

                          Really ? Really really really ? How could someone like you fall in that trap ?

                          N Offline
                          N Offline
                          Nagy Vilmos
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #15

                          MONEY!


                          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                          R 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • N Nagy Vilmos

                            MONEY!


                            Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                            R Offline
                            R Offline
                            Rage
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #16

                            As Georges woudl have said: what else ? :rolleyes:

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • N Nagy Vilmos

                              I... ...write... ...code... ...in... ...VB... ... :sigh:


                              Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                              P Offline
                              P Offline
                              peterchen
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #17

                              Well, if you are forced to use VB, you can always do like this:

                              Dim code;
                              code = "#include <stdafx.h>" & vbCRLF & _
                              "int main()" & vbCRLF & _
                              "{" & vbCRLF & _
                              " // ... " & vbCRLF & _
                              "}" & vbCRLF

                              ' TODO: RUN C Compiler

                              Agh! Reality! My Archnemesis![^]
                              | FoldWithUs! | sighist | µLaunch - program launcher for server core and hyper-v server.

                              C J 2 Replies Last reply
                              0
                              • N Nagy Vilmos

                                I... ...write... ...code... ...in... ...VB... ... :sigh:


                                Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                                L Offline
                                L Offline
                                LittleYellowBird
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #18

                                :omg: My sincere condolences! ;)

                                Ali

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • C Corinna John

                                  Well, maybe he uses VB and he is a programmer. But that doesn't mean he is a "VB programmer". ;)

                                  This statement is false.

                                  M Offline
                                  M Offline
                                  Mark_Wallace
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #19

                                  Corinna John wrote:

                                  he uses VB and he is a programmer. But that doesn't mean he is a "VB programmer".

                                  I think we need clarification on the direction of the dependency.

                                  I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!

                                  C 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • P peterchen

                                    Well, if you are forced to use VB, you can always do like this:

                                    Dim code;
                                    code = "#include <stdafx.h>" & vbCRLF & _
                                    "int main()" & vbCRLF & _
                                    "{" & vbCRLF & _
                                    " // ... " & vbCRLF & _
                                    "}" & vbCRLF

                                    ' TODO: RUN C Compiler

                                    Agh! Reality! My Archnemesis![^]
                                    | FoldWithUs! | sighist | µLaunch - program launcher for server core and hyper-v server.

                                    C Offline
                                    C Offline
                                    CPallini
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #20

                                    Well, if I would able to understand VB syntax then I should say you know well VB syntax... :-D

                                    If the Lord God Almighty had consulted me before embarking upon the Creation, I would have recommended something simpler. -- Alfonso the Wise, 13th Century King of Castile.
                                    This is going on my arrogant assumptions. You may have a superb reason why I'm completely wrong. -- Iain Clarke
                                    [My articles]

                                    P 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • N Nish Nishant

                                      A talking frog I can digest. But a Visual Basic programmer! What is this? Some kind of sick perverted joke? :mad:

                                      Regards, Nish


                                      Nish’s thoughts on MFC, C++/CLI and .NET (my blog)
                                      My latest book : C++/CLI in Action / Amazon.com link

                                      I Offline
                                      I Offline
                                      Ian Shlasko
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #21

                                      Nishant Sivakumar wrote:

                                      A talking frog I can digest.

                                      I dunno... Have you ever tried frog legs? I heard they're pretty nasty... Now imagine them talking to you on the way down.

                                      Proud to have finally moved to the A-Ark. Which one are you in?
                                      Author of Guardians of Xen (Sci-Fi/Fantasy novel)

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • N Nagy Vilmos

                                        Designed and implimented a retail banking system in VB a few years back currently work on a trading platform with a lot of VB front end components. So yes, I can write VB, but I prefer Java or C# poking an eye out with a shitty stick [ftfms].


                                        Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                                        R Offline
                                        R Offline
                                        Rage
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #22

                                        Nagy Vilmos wrote:

                                        retail banking system

                                        Nagy Vilmos wrote:

                                        trading platform

                                        Yeah, now I understand. You're not doing VB for money. You're doing VB for a lot of money.

                                        N 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • N Nagy Vilmos

                                          Designed and implimented a retail banking system in VB a few years back currently work on a trading platform with a lot of VB front end components. So yes, I can write VB, but I prefer Java or C# poking an eye out with a shitty stick [ftfms].


                                          Panic, Chaos, Destruction. My work here is done. or "Drink. Get drunk. Fall over." - P O'H

                                          I Offline
                                          I Offline
                                          Ian Shlasko
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #23

                                          Yep, lots of trading software written in VB... Funny thing... If I hadn't put VB6 on my resume, back when I graduated college, I never would have gotten the job that started my career on wall street... Started out maintaining and updating old VB6 and Excel VBA systems... Then, once I had proven myself, I rewrote most of it in C# :)

                                          Proud to have finally moved to the A-Ark. Which one are you in?
                                          Author of Guardians of Xen (Sci-Fi/Fantasy novel)

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