While there should not be panic, people should remain informed. You sir, are obviously not. > until she was really bad. "She" was a "he" and his parents did not wait until he was really bad. Within 24 hours of the toddler's display of symptoms, he was hospitalized. Despite good care, the child died. As a mom of two little ones myself, my heart goes out to the parents. The child's immune system was already compromised by a sickness already. Tragic circumstances, and the parents should not be blamed. The media, while maybe guilty of overplaying the story (like they do with any story of the day), provides a service to those who do need to know the hows, whys, and wheres of what is going on. Those who have already compromised immune systems are in greater danger ANY time there's a flu, and should take greater care. My little ones do have illnesses which do compromise them when they get other illnesses, such as the flu, and I appreciate being able to turn on the news and see where the latest cases of H1N1 have occurred. If I can change my travel plans in order to give my babies a fighting shot at not contracting an illness, I will do so. A death, especially a child's, is a big deal, no matter what the circumstances. The number of deaths may be low, but if it is your child that dies, the numbers seem too high. Sorry if this comes across harsh, but I have found the attitudes towards that little boy's death to be very callous, here on this board, and other places. Some comments have ranged from "oh well, he was mexican" to yours "the parents didn't seek help in time." Just wrong. blueSprite

How about something directly to the point: "NKSS-Lounge" ? Or if we want to avoid all of the "what does NKSS stand for" questions, it could be spelled out. Says what it is, its rating and something about the attendees all in one phrase! Of course, "The Lounge After Dark" pretty much translates to "Nightclub" so it could be "NKSS-Nightclub"..... blueSprite

Vaccinate, in my opinion. But you can request that the MMR (the one in debate) shot be broken into three distinct shots, instead of one whiz-bang do-it-all shot. Please discuss the entire issue in depth with your children's pediatrician so that you can make the choice with all the information you can. I've been following the debate/discussion on this very closely, so that I could determine what to do for my little ones as well. I had both little ones vaccinated, even with the MMR vaccination. The potential for complications from the diseases that the children could contract without the vaccinations are great. And since schools are beginning to see outbreaks of these diseases once again, I decided to protect my children from the diseases. One of the theories that I've read concerning the autism-link (and the link has been disproven supposedly, but who knows)is that there may be a gene whose expression is triggered either by the high fever that may result as a reaction to the vaccination, or perhaps by the combination of the three shots. The gene's expression might be triggered otherwise maybe not. Other studies say there is absolutely no link. What confuses it even more are the heartbreaking stories from parents who have even delayed the MMR shot, and then right after child's reaction to the shot, language never returns (which means the autism wasn't expressed during the usual 12 month to 2 year time span, but later, which defies the coincidental timing argument). It's difficult to make an informed decision. I tried to make mine on a logical basis, and not a knee-jerk emotional one, but some of the parents' stories are difficult to explain. I am mentioning these items not to claim to know oh-so-much, but to mention the different camps of thinking. I have to run to pick up my children, so I can't follow this thread until tomorrow, but I am very interested to hear others' opinions as well. Take care all. blueSprite

Why do you feel compelled to "compete" with your last bday gift to her and with a bday gift from her old boyfriend? I don't think too highly of her if she's making you feel like you have to compete with a gift an ex-boyfriend gave to her! What if next year, circumstances have it where you temporarilly have no money to spend on frivolity? Would she still love you? Still want to be your girlfriend? Does she love you for you or for what you can give her and do for her? Hey maybe you don't care, and maybe you get off on being the big guy throwing around money impressing people. But there just seems a lot wrong with the situation here where you are trying to top things. Obviously just my opinion. I've always been the type of female to look through all of the garbage to get to what the person is like. I wish you luck with her birthday and with the relationship.

Yes, I should not have given out so much information. Especially since I did not know that they had the transaction details until after I spouted information. Stupid stupid stupid of me. I will definitely use the call back method in the future. Thanks.

Good idea. Thanks.

Thanks for that advice. I will definitely handle it that way in the future. Asking for a verifiable number to call back sounds like the way to go. Thank you.

I did give them the last 4 digits of my SSN. The weirdness started when the automated voice menu asked for the last 4 digits, I punched them in, they were not recognized, and that's when the human came on the phone (and she also queried my for the last 4 digits). I did not to give out my full SSN (at least I have that much common sense, but no more than that), but I had thought last 4 digits was ok- I have no idea anymore if that's true or not. So you think it sounds legit?

Before anyone points out how stupid I was, I already realize that I was an idiot. In my defense, I was on my third day of only one or two hours of sleep each night because of really really sick children (including an ER trip etc)... basically, during the phone call I barely had any mind with which to use... To fastforward to the end, I called our bank right after, and the associate believes that I was NOT scammed, but I am going to follow up further tonight, asking more questions and trying to verify that things are ok. Here's the situation: I get a recorded call giving my husband's name and mine, and naming our bank, saying that they wish to verify charges on our credit card. Saying press one if I am this-person-they-name. Then enter last 4 digits of SS. I do so, the phone rejects it and a human comes on the phone. Asks the same questions, I answer (with two babies fussing in the background, but I figured I had to straighten out whatever was going on with our credit card otherwise, I don't know the sky would fall, stupid I know, I know, wasn't thinking clearly at all). She explains that they are verifying charges (which our bank has done before, so I thought it was ok). She asks to verify home address, I do (stupid stupid stupid). Then she lists 4 recent charges. Three I recognize, did not recognize the final one. She says she will block the card until I call back. Gives me a number. Husband comes home. Says that the 4th charge is ok, he made it. I call back, and the number gives me a new number for directory assistance. Sinking feeling in my stomach. I'm almost in tears. I take care of my babies for a bit, my hubby plays with them as I call the bank proper. I explain to them what went on, and at first she says she thinks I've been scammed. Then I give her the number they gave me, and she says it matches the third party company they use to verify charges. She has no idea why the number forwarded me to a new dir assistance number, but everything should be ok. She said that the card was not marked as blocked, but sometimes the third party company puts in an order to the bank to block it, and it doesn't happen immediately. But she made notes of the entire exchange, and says things should be ok. My husband is unsure as am I. He's received calls before that have verified charges, but they have never started off with an automatic voicemail thingie. I just have a bad feeling about the entire exchange. Any advice on how to follow up further on this? I was thinking of calling the bank b

That's great news that all went well. Have been thinking about your little ones and wondering how they were doing. What a good daddy you are. :rose:

As a lurker here (and mother of two toddlers), I could not help but be moved by your post. I will add my thoughts and prayers to the other good vibes that most assuredly will be sent your way. I don't know the full-story, but from reading a few other of your recent posts, it sounds like you and your little girls have been through a lot. I am sorry to hear that there is yet another challenge ahead tomorrow. Best of luck to you and your little ones. Hugs to them.:rose:

Hi Christopher, I'll offer my humble suggestions for reaching audiences of varying taret ages (didn't have time to read all of the responses you received- only spot checked a few, so sorry if any of this is repetitive): I suggest a multi-prong approach. Write a book. No I'm not kidding. That exposure would lead you to the Barnes And Noble and Borders crowds. And if the title/topic is catchy enough, the morning talk show crowds might pull you in (Good Morning America, the Today Show, erc, always seem to have the "latest" author on) You'd catch the I-don't-want-to-leave-for-work-yet crowd (me ;) and the housewife/househusband crowd (pls don't judge me for watching those shows- my brain is just too sleepy at that time for hard core news) Become a part-time motivational speaker. High schools are always looking for inexpensive speakers. If you are charismatic, the teens may actually listen instead of text msging one another. This is easier if you have a published paper or book to show the school's guidance counsellor, in order to give your message validity (so (s)he can easily see what msg you will be providing to the students). Start a web site. Might catch on, if the keywords eventually bubble up into something google would display. Coffee Houses- discussions often take place there, or sometimes authors/poets may read their stuff. Offer some gimmick (not sure how this would be done)... a podcast that could be downloaded from your website, or first fifty to respond (in a positive manner) to some chat or bb on your website receives a pencil/mug/t-shirt with your catch phrase (that I'm sure you'll come up with soon) ;) on it. And as another poster said, your positive msg may not be well received by the goth crowd for instance... they want to be pessimistic as their schtick. The goth fad may fade but there will probably be another similar one to replace it. I think your idea is a lovely one, and I hope you pursue your idea of spreading optimism. Best of luck. blueSprite:rose:

Or use GPS - the "new-fangled" :) ones provide a great listing of hotels, nearby restaurants, theaters, etc in their "entertainment" section. Plus directions to get to the locations, obviously! I was ambivalent when my husband decided to purchase ours, but quickly became converted to a true-believer in their usefullness. So leave the laptop, and get a GPS! blueSprite:rose:

Hi Ravi, This has been quite the unusual experience, hasn't it? How are the roads around you? Still passable? Did you still have to go to work too? Try to stay dry ;) blueSprite :rose:

Hi, I was wondering how many people here reside in the northeast of the U.S.? I'm in New Hampshire, and we have over 300 roads closed due to flooding or actual washouts. From what I hear, Maine, Massachusetts, and New Hampshire are in a State of Emergency because of the floods. Many schools have been closed. There are a few whole towns closed (only emergency vehicles allowed on the roads in those towns). Some have been evacuated, and in other only specific streets have been evacuated. Of course, we're still expected to be at work, where I am now. The roads in my town are passable right now. Rivers are expected to crest within the next 24 hours (tributaries and the like are running south into the larger rivers, so our river near here hasn't reached its full height yet). Rain has stopped for now. But more rain is expected :( blueSprite:rose:

But the .1 percent of us who are here really appreciate the sentiment! Thanks, :rose: blueSprite (stepmom to one, and soon-to-be-mommy to another)

Congratulations! My husband and I had a wedding that I am proud of to this day. It was beatiful, but did not cost a fortune. We had decided early on to only invite the people closest to us- meaning parents, siblings, a few close aunts and uncles, and closest friends. We had under 50 people. This meant no Aunt Tilly from Missouri, no relative that we hadn't seen in years, etc. By doing this, it made the occasion intimate and special. We had the ceremony in our local church, and the reception at a Sheraton Tara. I had made all of the table centerpieces myself, and bought a ton of tiny white lights, all of which the Tara staff put up for me. We had flowers professionally done, but kept it to a minimum (they weren't the centerpieces, ie. less expensive). We did not skimp on the meal- we had three choices (filet mingon, chicken of vegetarian) which guests chose from on their invitations. Oh I should mention, that while our pictures were being taken, hors-d-oevres were servedin a reception room, while a strolling violinist played. That violinist was later joined by a celloist in the reception room, where both played as background dining music. Since we had a small group of people, we decided not to have dancing, just the live classical duo. We had a cake, but skipped the "shove in your mouth" part- just all very elegant. We received soooo many compliments on how classy the wedding and reception was. Comments ranged on everything from how honored the guests felt because it was such an intimate setting, to my husband's relative muttering to his wife "whoa she must be loaded to have done it up like this". A friend (from England) said our wedding was akin to a traditional English wedding- very nicely done. And I spent 1/3 of what I knew some of my friends had spent on theirs. People can go nuts with what they spend. Just do as much as you can yourself (or your fiancee and her friends can) and you save oodles of money. Also limiting guests will help greatly. BTW, even though a cruise (or destination wedding) sounds lovely, please keep in mind that you'd be asking your guests to come up with cruise ticket money and vacation money for your wedding... Why not just go on a cruise after your wedding, and in that way, not impose upon others as much? Just a thought.

Hi David, Guess I'm guilty of misinterpreting your offhand joke (which you and others had cleared up for me). To explain why, maybe this will help. In college (in the U.S.) one of the kindest and gentlest people I had ever met kept a realistic gun-like water pistol with him (illegal now to do that). Once when some unsavory characters were approaching us with not-so-good intent, my friend let his jacket open slightly, and the would-be-attackers left us alone. Of course, his bluff could have just as easily backfired- but you know the young..... So for me, it wasn't a huge leap to go from water pistol to perhaps a real gun, to be shown to the others who wish you harm, in order for them to leave you alone. I wasn't implying that I thought you had intended harm by asking what I did, but I was asking the legality of it in Great Britian (a question I know now is moot). I just wanted you to know my question wasn't a reflection of what I think of you, but of sheer curiosity. Sorry if it added stress to your already stressful situation. :rose: blueSprite -- modified at 10:33 Wednesday 5th April, 2006

Oh, thanks, that explains it. :rose: blueSprite

"Parents and teachers alike are forbidden to discipline kids for their behaviors, and the result is a generation of people with little respect for others and no sense of responsibility for the things they do that harm themselves and others. " I second your sentiment. If somehow all parents could all agree to start instilling the concept of "personal responsibility and accountability" in the lil darlins, then society as a whole would benefit. A few good parents cannot make up for the lack in others. And you're right, somehow currently parents and teachers are discouraged from disciplining children in fear of destroying the children's self-esteems. I think it has backfired terribly, and we will all pay a high price for it, imho. :rose: blueSprite