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Chris'isms

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  • A Andrew Rissing

    Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

    A Offline
    A Offline
    Andrew Rissing
    wrote on last edited by
    #9

    Chris once fell asleep with his head on the keyboard. Through a process of diffusion, this site was created by the time he woke up.

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    • A Andrew Rissing

      Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

      C Offline
      C Offline
      CMullikin
      wrote on last edited by
      #10

      The servers weren't running fast enough, so Chris plugged the ethernet cord into his ear. Overall site speed went up 64%.

      The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

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      • A Andrew Rissing

        Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

        A Offline
        A Offline
        Andrew Rissing
        wrote on last edited by
        #11

        Chris lives in Canada because he prefers cooler environments. It allows him to overclock his internal CPUs.

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        • A Andrew Rissing

          Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

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          L Offline
          Lost User
          wrote on last edited by
          #12

          Chris deemed the site should have mobile access... So mobile access conformed to Chris' site.

          Computers have been intelligent for a long time now. It just so happens that the program writers are about as effective as a room full of monkeys trying to crank out a copy of Hamlet.

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          • A Andrew Rissing

            Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

            S Offline
            S Offline
            S Houghtelin
            wrote on last edited by
            #13

            Chris says he is from Australia to cover the fact he’s really from another planet. CP Bob is Chris and what he really looks like. :Bob:

            It was broke, so I fixed it.

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            • A Andrew Rissing

              Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

              A Offline
              A Offline
              Andrew Rissing
              wrote on last edited by
              #14

              As a child, Chris' first words were:

              main()
              {
              printf("hello, world");
              }

              Unfortunately, his parents were unaware of how to compile the code.

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              • A Andrew Rissing

                Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

                L Offline
                L Offline
                Lost User
                wrote on last edited by
                #15

                Chris' keyboard[^]

                Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. ~ George Washington

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                • L Lost User

                  Chris' keyboard[^]

                  Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. ~ George Washington

                  C Offline
                  C Offline
                  Corporal Agarn
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #16

                  I did not know bob had another site. (technabob)

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                  • A Andrew Rissing

                    Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

                    P Online
                    P Online
                    PIEBALDconsult
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #17

                    The current Chris is really the second coming of Chris.

                    P 1 Reply Last reply
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                    • A Andrew Rissing

                      Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

                      A Offline
                      A Offline
                      AspDotNetDev
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #18

                      Chris doesn't make typos; when he types a new word, it gets added to the dictionary.

                      Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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                      • P PIEBALDconsult

                        The current Chris is really the second coming of Chris.

                        P Offline
                        P Offline
                        Pete OHanlon
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #19

                        Must resist the obvious jokes.

                        I was brought up to respect my elders. I don't respect many people nowadays.
                        CodeStash - Online Snippet Management | My blog | MoXAML PowerToys | Mole 2010 - debugging made easier

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                        • A Andrew Rissing

                          As a child, Chris' first words were:

                          main()
                          {
                          printf("hello, world");
                          }

                          Unfortunately, his parents were unaware of how to compile the code.

                          A Offline
                          A Offline
                          Adam R Harris
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #20

                          HA - this is the best so far.

                          Don't comment your code - it was hard to write, it should be hard to read!

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                          • A Andrew Rissing

                            Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

                            W Offline
                            W Offline
                            Wendelius
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #21

                            There's no Escape on Chris' keyboard. Also delete and backspace buttons are untouched.

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                            • A Andrew Rissing

                              Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

                              S Offline
                              S Offline
                              Single Step Debugger
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #22

                              SQL Server is more than ten times faster than Oracle, if DBA is Chris Maunder.

                              There is only one Vera Farmiga and Salma Hayek is her prophet! Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

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                              • A Andrew Rissing

                                Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

                                S Offline
                                S Offline
                                Single Step Debugger
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #23

                                C++ stands for Chris plus plus.

                                There is only one Vera Farmiga and Salma Hayek is her prophet! Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

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                                • C CMullikin

                                  I almost started this exact thread because of our previous exchange[^]. :laugh: -All of the other CP staff accounts are really just Chris's sock puppets that he uses as a cover for his mad site building skillz.

                                  The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin

                                  T Offline
                                  T Offline
                                  thatraja
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #24

                                  Colin Mullikin wrote:

                                  -All of the other CP staff accounts are really just Chris's sock puppets that he uses as a cover for his mad site building skillz.

                                  One more possible hidden secret identity - Chris Maunder - Troll Hunter[^]

                                  thatraja

                                  FREE Code Conversion VB6 ASP VB.NET C# ASP.NET C++ JAVA PHP DELPHI ColdFusion
                                  HTML Marquee & its alternatives

                                  Nobody remains a virgin, Life screws everyone :sigh:

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                                  • S Single Step Debugger

                                    C++ stands for Chris plus plus.

                                    There is only one Vera Farmiga and Salma Hayek is her prophet! Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

                                    A Offline
                                    A Offline
                                    AspDotNetDev
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #25

                                    Being impossible, it just overflows and ends up as something significantly short of the Chris standard.

                                    Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

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                                    • S Single Step Debugger

                                      C++ stands for Chris plus plus.

                                      There is only one Vera Farmiga and Salma Hayek is her prophet! Advertise here – minimum three posts per day are guaranteed.

                                      P Online
                                      P Online
                                      PIEBALDconsult
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #26

                                      It's called C++ because Chris gave it two upvotes.

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                                      • A Andrew Rissing

                                        Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

                                        C Offline
                                        C Offline
                                        Chuck N0rris
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #27

                                        Andrew Rissing wrote:

                                        How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder?

                                        I have copied these[^] from Chris's diary. Shame on me.

                                        Chuck Norris

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                                        • A Andrew Rissing

                                          Since have a lack of 185's to keep us busy around here. How about a few 'Chuck Norris' inspired jokes about Chris Maunder? I'll start us off: -The story about the hamsters is just a cover. Chris actually types out each page response by hand. This is why the server sometimes goes down - as Chris is swapping out a worn out keyboard.

                                          A Offline
                                          A Offline
                                          AspDotNetDev
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #28

                                          The only reason Chris isn't considered The Most Interesting Man in the World is because he already beat :bob: as The Most Interesting Alien in the Universe. Stay :java: my friends.

                                          Thou mewling ill-breeding pignut!

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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